"Snouts of pigs who hab housing..." B**k Reports: Seven Themes Explicated in Ersatz Terza Rimas

     I. Disney porkers' snouts fall short of celebrity's probosces. 

Snouts of pigs who hab housing with straw, sticks and bricks? 
Pugs! Durante and Bergerac, famed for their beaks,
rout ‘em. Jimmy and Cyrano's? Noses of freaks!

     II. Classical music is superior to jazz.

Herren Johann Sebastian and C.P.E., Bachs,
trump top trumpeter Beiderbeck, nickname o’ Bix,
here heard honing his Wolverine Orchestra licks. 

     III. Apartheid thrives in Soweto

Onyx, ebony, charcoal and licorice, blacks,
overshadow the skins of South African blokes 
who wind up as the butts of insensitive jokes. 

     IV. Diversity trumps ability

Messrs. David and Mel, with Louise, bubbly Brooks, 
team with Clifford and Arnold, boys (brothers!) born Bax.
The quintet seems possessed of all manner of knacks.

     V. French cuisine blows away kitchen kitch

Mses. Martha and Julia: each biddy bakes,
crafting cookies, crepes, cupcakes, nor not from a box.
About Stewart I’m hesitant. Julia rocks!

     VI. It’s better to be smart than to look smart.

Brothers Bezos and Zuckerberg scored the big bucks.
And while both boys deserved ‘em – or so say their books --
each excelled using grey matter, never good looks.

     VII. The medium is only half the message.  

William (first name) and Edwards (surname): both be Blakes.
Both be visual artists, too -- right off their blocks.
One graves prints, one shoots films. Both boss -- down to their socks.