Original Alpha Betes (from AmalgaMates by Ulysses Poe)
The Apogeeraffe, the Boffolo, the Chargé d'aFerret, the Deep Seal,
the Emperorang, the First Plaice, the Genuinocerous, the Higheenah,
the Inside Trackoon, the Jupitern, the Keytiwake, the Lezzruff-Tew Weevils
the Magnacum Louse, the Notbadger, the Optimuskrat, the Parve Gnu,
the Qualiteal, the Reagle, the Staytodee Hart, the Topadee Lion, the Übear
the VIPeacock, the Wowl, the Xanadugong, the Yakohinoor and the Zebravo
New Alpha Betes
One: The EgotisTick
The EgotisTick, to be chosen top pick,
pushes lunatic schtick. (His routines make me sick.)
Two: The Notoriole
Notoriole's smarm...? Her attempts to disarm
all who'd cause undue harm to the City of Charm.
Three: The UpperCrustacean
The Upper Crustacean plies troth to a Haitian
who, choosing migration, flees Drumpf's "shithole nation."
Four: The Well-EduKatydid
The Well-EduKatydid, pregnant (tho' keepin' hid),
travels far off the grid, has her kid, names 'im Sid.
Five: The Tsardine
Do Tsardines court friends who will go to all ends
to establish new trends...? That, or course, all depends...
Six: The Maxolotl
The young Maxolotl sips pop from a bottle.
Adult Maxoes waddle. (Some won't. Still, a lot'll.)
Seven: The StrawMandrill
The Straw Mandrill stars in B movies where czars
manage wine bars on Mars. (No: no Oscars. Yes: scars.)
Eight: The Acmeerkat
The Acmeerkat clan...? Erect -- to a man.
Their gals also can -- phase two of The Plan.
Their gals also can -- phase two of The Plan.
Nine: The Biguana
The beastie we call the Biguana is small.
He's more pint-size than tall. (It's the name's 'big' is all.)
Ten: The Best-in-Shoat
The Best-in-Shoat's haut: she sports (and I quote)
"a Porky-pink coat." But that's all she wrote.
Eleven: The Camelflage
The Camelflage hide appears multichrome-dyed.
Her inside's likewise pied. (Those insisting not lied.)
Twelve: The Dynamoray
The Dynamoray can't but have the last say,
adding, "Do it my way: you'll keep troubles at bay."
Thirteen: The Ritzetze
In Ritzetze's maws lie a pair of great jaws
where grin teeth much like saws. (Did I mention the claws...?)
Fourteen: The GentEel
With no white tie or topper, GentEel comes a cropper.
But with 'em, he's proper -- a real traffic-stopper.
Fifteen: The Efferpheasant
The Efferpheasant ain't no peasant.
He, when present, makes life pleasant.
Sixteen: The SuperiOrca
"The SuperiOrca inhabits Minorca
and oozes kavorka." -- F. Garcia Lorca
Seventeen: The Cream-o'-the Crappie
Why's his tongue floppy, its diction so sloppy...?
'Cuz Cream-'o-the Crappie smokes opium poppy.
(a work in progress)
Eighteen: The GlitteRat
The Kangaruler
The ExcellAnt
The Fabulouse
The Flagrant Fowl
The Gazellionaire
The GigAnteater
The Grandrewsarchus
The GardenWallaby
The High-'n'-Mite
The Infamouse
The MaCrow
The MamMoth
The Masscivet
The AristoCat
The PrinciPalomino
The SizeaBull
