Ara and Demarco
book a
bedsit B&B:
"…just digs for
research and development," dis-
closes Ar ‘n’ Dee.
Beauregard and
Arabelle, tran-
scend this loveless era,
and suc-
cumb
to Cupid's darts ‘n’ shafts, be-
coming Beau ‘n’ Ara.
Cal-
lista and
her Derwood were in-
vitees. (We say 'were'
because both
fail’d
to show -- or did we fail
to
check our Cal ‘n’ Der…?)
Deborah and Aaron, one
so-
phisticated pair,
are known by
other debonaire
young things as
"raw-ther...Deb ‘n’ Aar."
Ebenezer flips for Florence.
Fickle Florence, though,
runs hot and
cold.
Such indecisive lovers!
Call 'em 'Eb ‘n’ Flo.'
Frieda pulls, with Ethan
Zane, some
stunts which leave us queasy.
They’re so
breezy
– “c'est la vie”zy. Oh, so
free be Frie ‘n’ E.Z.!
Grin-
elda and
Barretto keep a
bird. Repeats this parrot,
"I'll de-
file thy
domicile." (Just grin 'n'
bear it, Grin ‘n’ Barrett'!)
Hamnet, a polygamist, weds
twice. (Both brides prove nags.
And, oddly,
both were
christen'd 'Agatha.') Meet
(don't eat!): Ham ‘n’ Ags.
Wendell's
pledg’d, "I'd bed Iphige-
nia." Ah, but then,
Iph vows, "That's
only if ‘n’ when we've
said 'I
do!'...as Iph ‘n’ Wen."
Justin and Tymothea were
decades
past their prime.
The knot they
tied.
Then up 'n' died. (The two be-
came one: Just ‘n’ Tyme.)
Kahtia weds Pickering,
but
soft...our plot grows thicker.
'Tain’t no
joke! A baby bloke is born -- a
little Kaht' ‘n’ Picker.'
To
Lemuel and Adrienne,
two
drys, our toast is made.
"Charge your
flutes,
good friends, with lemonade. All
fill’d...? To Lem ‘n’ Ade!"
Morris and Ramona: how
their
ardors overflow!
"I love you,
Mo!"
"I love you, 'Mo'!" (Love mo' 'n'
mo' do Mo ‘n’
'Mo'.)
Nehemiah and Tonette their
calisthenics know:
"Hey, Neh'! Hey,
To'e! Please
do that one call’d 'Head 'n'
shoulder, knee 'n' toe'!"
Booker idolizes
Oprah...
sinker,
line 'n' hook!
We trust Ms.
Oprah
feels the same. They read just
like an Ope ‘n’ Book.
Phillip and d'Blanca's
hope to
win the sweepstakes sank
because that
pair, Phil ‘n’ d'Blanc', forgot
to --
first! -- "fill in de blank!"
Qisma and Telemachus:
their
book is selling well.
Its title...?
"Life
Among the Gays: a kiss 'n'
tell
by Qis ‘n’
Tel."
'Tis
Rodney versus Helen: neither
wishes t'other well.
Say Rod and
Helen
(as do Hel and Rod): "Your
ass can rot in
hell!"
Samuel and Rose, raw
fish a-
ficionados, know;
one serves wa-
sabi
with one's salmon roe. "Ban-
zai!"
shout Sam ‘n’
Ro.
I question’d
Ahmet
Ree and Trigve:
"What be
'2ab cos C'...?"
"Why, that's just
simple
trigonometry," said
Trig ‘n’ Ahmet Ree!
"Upton and his
Atamantha,"
notes our latest datum,
"both have
chosen
to keep dozin.'" Up 'n'
at 'em, Up' ‘n’ Atam'!
Vergil
and his Bertha, in dis-
cussing virgin birth,
have
now be-
come
conception experts and are
known as Virg ‘n’ Berth.
Watson questions Helen “Wazzup,
Helen…? What in hell...?”
Which leads the
people
overhearing ‘em to
call ‘em Wat ‘n’ Hel.
Grace’s
love for Xavier proves
such a saving grace.
You’re all in-
vited to the wedding…compli-
ments of Xav' ‘n’ Grace.
Yasser and Ms. Deedee,
yokels,
holler “Yass, indeed!"
Or, as their
matching
tattoos broadcast to the
county: “Yas’ ‘n’ Deed.’’”
The-
resa
said to Zedediah,
"I wouldst have 'em bury
us as
one:
"Here lies the ver-r-r-ry seden-
tary Zed' ‘n’ Terri."
