Doggerel Days or Calendar Caliente for August 2019, the Hottest August on Record

     (8/1)
It’s hot! (Tres hot: 
luke warm it's not.) 
Ann Miller got 
it: "...too darn hot!"

     (8/2)
Da's AC's shot.
Ma's…? Gone to pot. 
Cole Porter'd jot 
it: "...too darn hot!"

     (8/3)
It's hot! (Think not…? 
Ya'll don't know squat.)
So-o-o-o hot one's snot 
starts not to clot.

     (8/4)
One's nose approx-
imates a Brät, 
while lucid thoughts 
turn most exot-

     (8/5)
-ic: dream scenes fraught 
with Lancelot 
and Ladies of 
Shalott, Mahat-

     (8/6)
-ma Gandhi, An-
dy Kohut, Lot-
-te Lenya, di-
-va Montserrat

     (8/7)
Caballé, sheiks 
who reek of rot-
-ten leeks in oil
of Bergamot,

     (8/8)
or Benoit
B. Mandelbrot 
(whose fractal "aht" 
I like a lot).

     (8/9)
Be you quadru-
-ple bi-pass’d tot; 
be you the Hoo-
-ple or the Mott;

     (8/10)
don pinstripe, check 
or polka dot; 
inhab McMansh 
or vacant lot;

     (8/11)
prefer weak tea 
or pepper pot 
(if tea, ami, 
that says a lot);

     (8/12)
be sri or sultan, 
late of Swat, 
prefer straight lace 
or gordian knot;

     (8/13) 
be you robot-
-ic or karat-
-e maven -- you
may need a shot --

     (8/14)
if not, at least 
some bottled wat'... 
("Some what…?" you quer-
-y.) Water, twat!

     (8/15)
("Oo-o-o-oops! Just the flu-
-id I'd forgot.") 
Who's else is hot 
(though Turandot...

     (8/16)
is not)…? Why, Rob-
-ert Falcon Scott 
of the Antarc-
-tic: "...'Sbloody hot!"

     (8/17)
Who else is hot…?
Hell's Margey Schott, 
pro-Nazi sot: 
"Mein Gott! Ich's hot!"

     (8/18)
Who else is hot…? 
Anwar Sadat. 
My cot, though in
a shady spot,

     (8/19)
feels, lately, like
a lobster pot: 
it makes me wish 
I'd got a yacht...

     (8/20)
or could lay hands 
on your garrotte. 
At least, thank god,
I need not trot...

     (8/21)
(tho' true, I do, 
more oft than not). 
But why's it hot...?
Have you forgot...?

     (8/22)
The USA's
a "melting pot." 
In any case, 
there lies this spot --

     (8/23)
it’s but a blot, 
a teensy dot – 
a beauty spot quite 
comely...? Not!) --

    (8/24)
upon die Son-
-ne...done! It's hot. 
(Or, like as not, 
some knotty plot...

    (8/25)
of Aeroflot's,
or, p'rhaps, Pol Pot's.) 
Kool-Aid, it's said's, 
verboten: "...Dot-

    (8/26)
-dot-dot-dash-dash-
dash-dot-dot-dot..."* 
Yet, 'til the Trane
Man states he's got...
     * Mr. Morse's code for 'S.O.S.'

    (8/27)
our S.O.S, it's 
still hot, wot! 
Some cooler spot 
to plant one's "bott"...?

   (8/28)
You'll find no tit-
-tle -- not one jot. 
Say...is it me 
or is it not...

   (8/29)
just that much hot-
-ter since I sta't-
-ed jotting this, 
my Ode De Hot...?

   (8/30)
It's hot! So what...?
There's simply "not-“
-thing to be done...
but kvetch alot.

   (8/31)
Cole got it right: 
It’s too darn hot. 
(Ol' Cole's a rot-
-ter: too damn hot!)

   (9/1)
How's 'bout some cool 
September song...?
(September In The 
Rain’s not long.)

Dump D. Drumpf!

First written in September of 2016 but pertinent all over again

Dump D. Drumpf!
He spat out great gall. 
Dump D. Drumpf!
He shat on us all.
Are Republicans on some
hallucinogen…? 
Will conservative voters
snap out of it…? When…?

Dump D. Drumpf!
His widget's a wall. 
Dump D. Drumpf!
His digits are small. 
He mixes the Kool-Aid
supramicists drink. 
(And what must 
the global community think…?)

Dump D. Drumpf!
Do it now! Do not stall! 
'Twill prove fatal to wait
until late in the Fall: 
He's down with endorsements
from Duke and the Klan. 
So: why does he give the green light…?
'Cuz he can.

Don't Stalk! or The Second-to-Last Resort

If door-bust deal you hope to steal,
best practice: Run...don't walk! 
If neighbor's gate you'd "decorate,"
spray aerosols...don't chalk!
If names you'd slur which end in '-ner,'
shout ‘Hef’! Shout ‘Shat’! Don't ‘Faulk’! 
If Don the Drumpf you wish to dump,
just vote him out! (Don't stalk!) 

To batters who you'd shout "Skiddoo!"
just pitch the ball...don't balk!
If Tonys you would peer review,
vet Blair! Quiz Quinn...don’t “Hawk”!
If Donald's fro you'd overthrow,
to do it, bro, don't talk!
In short, if Drumpt you'd really dump,
just vote him out. (Don't stalk!)