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Friday, September 22, 2023

Locale Loca; or, Different Spheres For Different Peers

Goody Goose spiels, "It proved balm for my soul
     once I 
took to my heels to keep house in a hole." 
     "Still," in-
sists her twin sister, "that's no place to dwell.
     Mineshafts, 
mostly, are mouldy...and hollows are hell."
     "Oh, the 
nonsense you natter!" states Goody to Sis.
     "Do I 
ever shun tunnels or give mines a miss...?
     This here  
well where I dwell is humidity free,
     plus, the  
people who live here are nice as can be." 

*   *   *   *   *

Nicholas Knopf has determin'd that he
     will be 
fa-a-a-a-ar better off now he lives in a tree.
     Nicky's 
playfellow Jules gives fair warning to him:
     "You shall 
ne'er replace moi when you're stuck on some limb."
     "Au con-
trairemon young frère," Nick replies to his friend.
     "D'you sup-
pose I'll wax lonesome here...? Heaven forfend!
     This, my 
tree, don't you see, fills the span of the sky.
    With the 
legions herein I'll make friends by 'n' by."*

     *Here are a few of the friends, tree people all,
       who Nicholas anticipates making friends with:

St. David the Dendrite; 

eco-activist Julia Butterfly Hill; 

Kenya’s Njuguna Ng’ang’a;

purple-hair'd granny Shawnee Chasser;  

Collin Fenwick et al from Capote’s The Grass Harp;  

Cosimo di Rondo from Calvino’s The Baron in the Trees: 

Buile Shuibhne from Seamus Heaney’s take on the

medieval Irish tale he calls Sweeney Astray; 

the Galadrim people from Tolkein’s The Lord of the Rings

and Jose Arcadio in Gabriel Garcia Marquez’s

One Hundred Years of Solitude...not to mention

Jack of beanstalk fame.  


*   *   *   *   *

Fifi LeFleur, known as "Vertigo Faye"
     (who's a 
daughter by marriage to Ferde Grofé
     and de-
spite the affliction that prompted her name),
     feels a 
life atop pillars will garner her fame:
     "Did not 
Sim'on Stylites, for thirty-odd years, 
     made a 
pedestal home -- to the cheers of his peers...?
     More sty-
lites soon followed -- all welcomed the test.
     Thus the 
'polesters' I'll meet...? 10s! (The best never rest!)" 

*   *   *   *   *

     "Sup-
pose I were chosen Commander-in-chief
     of the 
shed at the head of this barrier reef,"
     fancies 
Perry de Paul, adding, "If so install'd,
     I'd be 
more than fired up; I'd be tot'lly enthrall'd..."
     "You'll be 
soak'd to the foreskin, brined up to the eyes,"
     inter-
jects's Perry's kin, "as all seven seas rise."
     "Fret ye 
not!" notes de Paul. "My appointment's no whim.
     Plus, each 
atoll inhabitant knows how to swim." 

*   *   *   *   *

     What re-
moval might prove a preeminent boon...?
     Well, the 
Finklemans think 'twould be life on the Moon.
     All their 
earthbound associates put 'em on guard:
     "A de 
lune relocation...? Humongously hard!"
     Oi! But 
Shmuel 'n' Sadie have made up their minds
     since a 
prominent Moon-housing researcher finds
     that "a 
minimal gravity helps one lose weight,
     plus the 
people who people the Moon are first-rate." 

Losts & Founds: An ABC

     The Lost Ark Careless Hebrews lost the Ark  but Jones, a gentile, found it --  along with half a dozen nasty  Nazis runnin' 'ro...