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Monday, March 20, 2023

Introducing Pig Pearl (& Featuring Her Sidekick Der Gabbermaus)






     Say "howdy do" 
to the blogosphere's 
newest dynamic duo 
of culture warriors.
     Follow the pair's 
metrical escapades 
as chronicled in the
series of seriously
lunatic limericks
appearing below.







     I. Pink Punks a POTUS

     "Damn his 
wig!" pipes pink pig name of Pearl,
     "...if Drumpf's 
chat's that I'm that sort of girl.
     First my 
rubber Drumpf kneaded,
     then 
nearly succeeded
     in 
pawing my pussy, the churl."

     II. Critical Base Theory

     Gab a-
vers: "Ethnic slurs be the basest!"
     Pearl con-
curs: "They're, for sure, 'out-of-place'est.
     Ne'er I'll 
shout, nor'll I natter:
     'No 
jive: Pink Lives Matter!'
     My 
case...? This eraser's no racist."

     III. Ron DeSandbag 

     Pig 
Pearl and Der Gab head for Florida,
     than whose 
governor blusters none horrider.
     "I'll say 
'Gay' if I please," 
     hollers 
Pearl; Gab agrees.
     (As was 
fear'd, though, Ron's veer'd even torrider.)

     IV. Fahrenheit 1984

     "What's with 
books which disquiet the Right...?
     First they 
ban 'em, then set 'em alight.
     Blimey! 
Even the Bible
     they're 
li'ble to libel.
     Thank 
God," grunts Gab, "Pearl's pink, not white."

     V. Which Lies Matter...? 

     "Once, 
folks were black, yellow or brown,"
     observes 
Gab. "Then folks white come to town
     sportin' 
second-rate brains,
     so are 
forced to wear chains..."
    "Pause," pleads 
Pearl. "Weren't it t'other way 'roun'...?"

     (more to come; a work in progress)

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