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Wednesday, August 16, 2023

Scarry Au Courant; or, DoowaldABC: an Abecedarial Double-Dutch Jumping Rhyme

 Doowaldeigh, doowaldeigh! What do some folks 
do all day...? 
 What's the actress do all day...? Feign she's straight, though 
plainly gay...?
 
 What's the banker do all day...? Mortgage homes though 
folk can't pay...?
 What's the colonel do all day...? Abuse his female 
attache...?
 
 What's the druggist do all day...? Endorse a bogus 
nasal spray...?
 What's the extra do all day...? Become her idol's 
protege...?

 What's the frat boy do all day...? Relax the ancient 
Roman way...? 
 What's the gringo do all day...? Routinely mispro-
nounce "Ole!"...?

 What's the horse thief do all day...? Traffic fossil 
equidae...?
 What's the intern do all day...? Scavenge off a 
patient's tray...?

 What's the juror do all day...? Payoffs from a 
witness weigh...?
 What's the Klansman do all day...? Pray black lives soon 
fade away...?

 What's the landlord do all day...? List which items 
don't convey...?
 What's the mayor do all day...? Do it Giuli-
ani's way...? 
 
 What's the Negro do all day...? Re-educate the 
KKK...?
 What's the orphan do all day...? Investigate her 
DNA...?
 
 What's the pontiff do all day...? Elect to look the 
other way...?
 What's the quisling do all day...? Fear the ball may 
ricochet...?

 What's the racist do all day...? Ape Emcee in 
"Cabaret"...?
 What's the strawman do all day...? Elaborate the 
shadow play...?

 What's the toady do all day...? Praise her boss's 
macrame...?
 What's the umpire do all day...? Misconstrue the 
double play...?

 What's the vegan do all day...? Eat three green things, 
come what may...? 
 What's the wastrel do all day...? Dream, "This, too, shall 
pass away"...?
 
 What's the X-Man do all day...? Draw comfort from his 
soubriquet...?
 What's the yahoo do all day...? Sweep the sty...? Re-
place the hay...?
 
 What's the zealot do all day...? Execute the 
VP, eh...?
 Doowaldeigh, doowaldeigh! That's what some folks 
do all day.

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