B is for Babs with severe hypertension.
C is for Carl, largely vegetative.
D is for Dotty whose mem’ry’s a sieve.
E is for Esther awaiting a heart.
F is for Fred of the flatulent fart.
G is for Gordon who suffers from gout.
H is for Helga whose hair’s fallen out.
I is for Ida. The itching’s come back.
J is for Johnny whose stools have turned black.
K is for Kurt who has holes in his colon.
L is for Lu. Her identity? Stolen.
M is for Maud with a face like a prune.
N is for Nick: turned 100 last June.
O is for Oscar. The man is obese.
P is for Pearl. (Best to leave Pearl in peace.)
Q is for Queenie who has to be fed.
R is for Ralph who’d be better off dead.
S is for Sylvie: can’t hear worth a damn.
T is for Tim, suff’ring flashbacks from Nam.
U’s for Umberto. Docs can’t find a cure.
V is for Vince: old…but still immature.
W’s Wilfred whose hemorrhoids swell.
X is for Xan of the singular smell.
Y’s for Yolanda: she’s had a bad fall.
Z is for ZaSu: she’ll outlive us all.
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