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Friday, September 3, 2021

En Dehors or On the Outs: an ABC (Past)

Aborigines wander the Outback.
When it’s bedtime, they’re out like a light.
One’s a cat in a hat:
Catch and put out that cat!
We can chat once that cat’s out of sight.
 
D. J. Drumpf takes a dumpf in our outhouse.
“Are you out,” voters shout, “of your mind…?”
(Will who denigrates him
end up out on a limb…?
Nonsense! Drumpf’s out to lunch, most folks find.)
 
Elephants hang out outdoors.
Did they not, we’d go out of our wits.
Certain frogs, tres outres,
will go out of their way
to tout only an outfit which fits.
 
Gregarious gnomes seem outgoing.
Often, hermits are outcasts, no doubt.
And ice lollys are fun.
(Can ice pops be outdone…?
I think not: such “improvements” are out.)
 
Are not jesters at court now outmoded…?
In the US, that jury’s still out,
sound decisions outweigh’d
by a South KKK’d.
(White supremacy’s all they’re about.)
 
Are not lesbians out of the closet…?
Where’d be Lincoln without ‘Honest Abe’…?
Doesn’t Lutwidge cry out,
“When a boojum’s* about,
let the toves and the mome raths outgrabe!”…?
 
     * A dangerous breed of snark made famous
by Charles L. Dodgson aka Lewis Carroll.
 
Nursing nuns by machines are outnumber’d,
making outpatients’ outcomes prove poor.
And the outlook looks grim,
since the chances are slim
that nun output improves that much more.
 
Won’t you please help me climb out from under…?
I so hope help comes out of the blue.
Some folk, out of their mind
when they’re out of gas, find
a petroleum outpost. Do you…?

Or do you, like most others, prepare for
the outpourings, which, out-qualified,
you await as you sail your outrigger...?
Are you out sick...? Indeed, have you died...?

Time to outsource your editing duties...?
Leave all outtakes from works of the Bard --
into blockbusters made: "Out vile jelly!" --
on the floor! (Who cares who in it starr'd..?)

Out voted, out weigh'd: all your 'out's seem outplay'd.
Is it past time to wander out west...?
World "Out X" yet remains wa-a-a-ay out yonder.
Plus, its out zone is far from the best.

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