Stifle Your Kids!

Admonish all your ankle biters! Bridle your bambinos!
Chaperone your cherubs! Dominate your dwarfarinos!

Educate your elvervolker! Fetter fast your fidgets!
Govern all your gamins! Guard your gremlins! Ground your gidgets!

Hog tie all your half-pints! Indenture your Infantae!
Jail your junior jackanapes! Kibosh your kiddies, kan’t ye!

Lock away your lambkins! Muzzle all your moppets!
Nail your Nips! O'erhaul your offspring! Playpen – please – your poppets! 

Quell your quints! Rein in your rugrats! Silence all your sucklings!
Tailor-tune your tadpoles (lest turn'd into ugly ducklings)!

Unfree your urchins – urgently! Your varmints? Please vamoose!

Wind down your whippersnappers – else each “whipper will” run loose.

Xenoblast your xiphomorphs! Yoke up all your young!

Fin’lly…ziplock all your z-z-z-z-zsters! If you do, this verse I’ll bung.

The View (in Briefs) from Seat Pleassant, MD

I’ve dined in Anaheinie, Callipygia.
Dog days I've pass'd in Arsealona, Spain.
In Bunnsylfannya’s Bethleham I’ve visited my people
(although Nana lives in Kinnebuttport, Maine).
Buttocksi, Mississippi? Just last month I paid a call.
In Dallass, Texass frequently I’ve tour'd.
Through Prairie Tushien, Wisconsin once I took a stroll.
I'm in asstonishing spots ever found immur'd.

Some day I'll view Buttswana in South Africa.
In Crackow, Poland long I've long'd to dwell.
A trip to Keister Island? The vacation of a lifetime.
Trear, Germany I sigh to see as well.
Queback and Oniontario in Canada: I hope 
some summer days there -- someday -- come to pass.
The Bottoman Rumpire I miss'd.
The Hamstead Heath as well. (I'm piss'd.)
But(t)...that's what comes from sittin' on my ass.