The Tweedles On Suits

“Play’d ball, The Ass of Di'monds did," droned Dum, as home his homey slid. 
"Play’d golf as well…at local links. We call’d him Ass of Clubs, methinks.
(Play’d soccer, too, a Melbourne side.*)" "Was Ass of Hearts his name…?" Dee cried.
"Nope. Him we dubb’d..." Dum answer’d back "...The Ass of Spades: his butt burn'd black." 

     * Perhaps a reference to the Melbourne City FC, known until recently as Melbourne
Heart. (Gosh! Another Suit.)