Granny Anna's Anagrampage Rampage Page: an ELASTic et als tour de farce

    "In the 

parish of Sleat, on the island of Skye

     stands a 

column of slate eight...no: nine meters high. 

     In Pi-

raeus, in Greece, stands an andresite stela

     that  

shadows the shrine of the martyr St. Ela.

     Just 

south of Malay lies the Gaspar Selat

     where swarm 

lates -- tho' freshwater pisces they're not,"

     lip syncs

lady o' lit'rature Madame De Staël 

     in a 

breath stale with onions, tobacco and bile.,,

     ...then pro-

ceeds: "Oxford waterwheels, nourish'd by leats,

     grind the 

grain so at least all the neighborhood eats.

     Likewise, 

malts for the Altes beer brewers obtain:

    'May thou 

laste and endure, brewers!' That's the refrain."

    Asks her

priest: "Who's been bit by the vampire Lesta-..."

     "Cease!! D'you 

think an astel overhead spares you...? Nah!"

     warns De 

Staël. "You need garlic to borrow or steal.

     ' Salte that

bloodsucker!'...? Nope! Garlic's still the ideal."

     "From a

tsela' of Adam God fashions an Eve.

     An es-

tal houses Christ -- if His book you believe,"

     drones De 

Staël as, invested in bean greens and teals,

     in her

Model X Tesla down East L she wheels.

     These -- her

quotes -- via lyrics from E'Last arrive.

     That Ko-

rean boy band et als help 'em survive.

     (If you

covet more nonsense, more poppycock tales,

     consult

<PlAysWEllWithLetTerS.com> for details.)

*   *   *   *   *

     Materials and minimal definitions; rhymes are

     consistent with pronunciation guides consulted online. 

ST. ELA: canonized Turkish woman   

STEAL: pilfer  

STALE: not fresh   

SLATE: metaphoric rock   

SLEAT: parish on island of Skye    

STAËL: Anne Louise Germaine French Revolution woman of letters     

STELA: upright stone column   

SALTE: imperative 'to salt'   

SELAT: Indonesian strait   

TEALS: several blue hues     

TALES: stories   

TESLA: electric auto     

TSELA': Hebrew for 'rib'   

ET ALS: several expressions of 'and others' 

E'LAST: Korean boy band   

ESTAL: Old French for stall or stable  

EAST L: east portion of alphabetized street   

ALTES: style of lager from Detroit       

ASTEL: arch of boards above miners' heads in shaft    

LEAST: smallest amount     

LATES: genus of freshwater perch    
LASTE: obsolete 'last' or imperative "Endure!"   

LEATS: several trenches leading to British waterwheels   

LESTA-...: reference to certain vampire (interrupted)