The Execution of the Executive or There Will Be B***d

"Extend your weapon. Draw a
bead.
For justice long denied you'd
bid."
Thus Fortune, in a dream, me
bade.

"He must not live to die in
bed,
who architects so beaucoup
bad.
Injustice must no longer
bide.

A thousand dimples to his
bod
you'll introduce with shot of
bird.
Pretend you're Hoppy (William
Boyd.)"

So spoke Dame Fortune, brazen
bawd.
"You be da trigger, -sman (Om-
bud-),
and do as my predictions 
bode."

Baboom! Baboom! Baboom! Ba-
boom!
Baboom! Baboom! Baboom! Ba-
boom!
Baboom! Baboom! (Nor no one
boo'd.)

A Trio of Tinkertings with Tara in Dactyls or Munnerlyn on My Mind

Gone with the
Wind! Who’s a
mav’rick may
find it pro-
nounced by some
bumpkins as
‘Gone with the
Wynde’ -- as the
phrase is, in
Cole’s Kiss Me
Kate (though there’s
data to
show that show’s
heard mispro-
nounced ‘Kiss Me
Kayta.’)

Perfect per-

formance as
Scarlett by
Vivien
prompts the A-
cademy’s
members to
give V an
Oscar. (In
whiche’er flick
Leigh’s next en-
deavor be,
ought she cry,
“Hungry a-
gain I will
never be!”…?)

Diss’d as a

harlot by
Pinkerton
(varlet!), this
missy play’d
Prissy to
Vivien’s
Scarlett. (This
riddle’s a
riff on one
Thelma, a
starlet who
said of re-
ligion, “Moi…?
Je ne pas
parle it.”)*

     * Referenced is 
Thelma McQueen,

actress and lifelong 
atheist.)

Twigments of My Imagination: Pairs of Alphabet Letters Provide Alliteratively Constrained Environments in Which Celebrities Dare to Dream

AA: Renaissance Art notable dreams of working in the altogether.

Allied 'A's address Titian's 
absurd apparitions. 

Tish dreams (wishes, seems) 
to wave all inhibitions.

BB: Baseball's Berra dreams of visiting the Old Country. But whose...? 

Both 'B's be 'bout Yogi's 
bewildering bogies. 

This game Hall-of-Famer's 
abstaining from hoagies. 
(Indeed, Yogi's feed 
comes from plated pierogies!)

CC: Angel (ret’d, Charley-type) dreams of failing to nix a gambling jinx.

Coupled 'C's conjure Farrah's 
cock'mamie chimeras. 

Ms. Fawcett, mit jaw set, 
hurls snake eyes at Harrah's.

DD: Powerful dream persuades this Capp hottie she's still a looker. 

Duple 'D's display Moonbeam's 
delusional daydreams. 

"Still fine," mulls McSwine. 
"Mine ain't needin' Olay creams."

EE: Poor Bo dreams of future unemployment, envisioning only eternal umbrage.

Echoed 'E's earmark Derek's 
eccentric etherics. 
Both show broad-boob'd Bo 
giving vent to hysterics.

FF: Infamous foreign agent Hari dreams of heading south of the border.

Fellow 'F's finger Mata's 
full-farcical fatas,

wherein (note her grin!) 
wry spies pummel piñatas.

GG: The uncle in the grisly "Addams Family" sit-com dreams of the confessional.

Gem'ni 'G's...? Glyphs for Fester – he's 
gross with grotesqueries:

all will appall. 
(He'll confess just the less scaries.)

HH: Motown cager Prince dreams of teaching Genealogy 101 at an all-white Detroit high school.

Four Half 'H's hold Tayshaun's 
hairbrain'd “h'llucinashauns.” 

This Piston's insistin,' 
"My sibs...? All ‘Alsashauns’!"

II: Idiot Veep dreams of continuing to suck eggs, goose-type.

Idem: 'I's index thick Dick's 
inane "idee fixe'd" (sic). 

Agreed: When VP'd, 
Cheney zero'd for six. (Sick!)

JJ: Calendar (Jalali-type) maven Omar dreams his poetry's roundly pooh-pooh'd.

Join'd 'J's...? Just O. Khayyam's 
joint jabberwock'd jimjams.

This Persian's "verse-'xcursions"...? 
Per'verse-'ical flim-flams!

KK: Creator of Khingachgook (sic) dreams of failing to employ spell check.

Kinn'd 'K's kindle Cooper's 
kookesque kama rupas. 

Jim's Pathfinder spellbinders...? 
Brimful of bloopers!

LL: Lahore sage dreams of delaying enlightenment for just one more evening.

Let 'L's limn Le Buddha's 
lightheaded laputas. 
Nirvana's anon. For now...? 
Lime-Jello shootahs!

MM: Married Massachusetts man dreams of scoring some illicit sex.

Matching 'M's max'mize Lodge's 
mind's muddl'd mirages. 

Hank Cabot's a Babbett 
ISO "massages." 

NN: Former Network TV doc dreams of chugging rubbing alcohol.

Neighb'rin' 'N's notate Kildare's 
nonsensical nightmares. 

The Doctor is crock'd, sir, 
thus subject to bugbears.

OO: Okuda creature, a Starship Captain, dreams of his Trek series living in reruns...forever.

One two 'O's...? Only Bakula's 
outré oraculas,

airin' Scott's darin' 
re: space-time spectacula's. 

PP: Political cartoonist dreams of getting his best ideas while dreaming.

Pair o' 'P's portrays T. Nast's 
preposterous phantasts. 
They'll fashion his passionate 
Tammany sarcasts.

QQ: 155-mph quick-service ace Andy dreams of illegal drug use.

Queu'd up 'Q's cue A. Roddick's 
"quite qwazy" quixotics. 
So fast we're aghast. 
(Is Rodd usin' narcotics...?)

RR: Toys 'R' Us icon dreams of putting 'base' back in 'customer base.'

Rhymin' 'R's relate Geoffrey's 
rude, radical rev'ries. 

This mascot shows tots 
lots of noir sides Mom ne'er sees!

SS: Cannibal's sado-dream exposes his criminality as largely genetic.

Sim'lar 'S's show Lector's 
sick, stark-ravin' spectres. 
As Hannibal's Nana scrawls: 
"I ♥ dissectors!"

TT: Tour cyclist dreams of enjoying scenic French views.

Two twin'd 'T's trace Sir Lance's 
(tsk tsk!) tomfool trances. 

Our star's worst bete noir’s 
when his next Tour de France is.

UU: Overstuff'd and underfoot Pillsbury mascot fails to curb his ravenous appetite.

Un'form 'U's unveil Doughboy 
in unhinged Utopoi. 

His dream...? Clotted cream...
atop tow'ring gâteau, boy!

VV: Hollywood (and vane) icon Walter weighs the politics of his career-long type casting.

Vis-a-'V's...? Views of Pidgeon's 
vertiginous visions. 

Each movie's to prove he 
won't play Dionysians.

WW: Rudyard's white-man's-burden creation dreams of a primate chorale.

Wedded 'W's wield Kim's 
wild- (-'n'-woolly) -eyed whims

showin' Jungle Guy humm'd to by 
chimps chantin' hymns.

XX: This Caesar, in X-rated dream, dons colorful and pricey designer underwear.

Extra 'X's [x]* Galba's 
xiphoidal xibalbas. 

He fancies he dances 
in dark Marc Chagall bras! 

     * Pronounced 'ex,' as is said when one’s ticking a box. 

YY: Charlemagne's youngish mistress dreams of being sweet-talked...again!

Yikes! Yok'd 'Y's yield up Himiltrude's 
yammerin' yakshatudes,

pha'sms where Chas hums 
flat medieval platitudes. 

ZZ: Ms. Pitts dreams of Oscar's Ernest's mom's dream of...(are you following all this...?)

Zwei 'Z's...? Zut! Don't miss 'em! 
Z-z-zaSu's "zombnamb'lisms"

nail Wilde's prim Miss Prism 
in wild Freudi'nisms!