A Rabbi, A Priest and a Kangaroo Walk Into a Bar: Vocallically Constrained Variations

Kanga, Roo and a bear living under the name of Sanders 
walk into a bar...

An eastern grey named Ken G. Aroostook 
walks into a bar…

A western grey arrested for plucking a rooster* 
walks into a bar…

King Kong, a room freshener salesman and an antilopine 
walk into a bar…

Hans Küng, a roofing sales rep/part-time mohel and a mallee 
walk into a bar…
A rubber ducky, NGA rooftop marksman Uly Poe and a wallaby 
walk into a bar...
     * Not to be confused with Jack Kent's 
comic strip monarch King Aroo.

Passing: a Fancy

A Sikh and a sheik and a shaman
walk into Moe’s Tavern. “How common
is the Northern white rhino?”
asks Moe. “How should I know?”
the Sikh pleads with pique. “I’m no Brahmin.”

So Szyslak addresses the sheik.

“Is the white rhino scarce? What’s your take?”
“It’s well known that they are,”
states the sheik, “although fa-a-a-ar
more endangered’s the pink-headed drake.”

In the meantime, a consequence weird

prompts a shrug and a tug of my beard.
Both the Sikh and the sheik –
as is Moe, for Lord’s sake,
and his tavern: they’re all disappear’d.