Of Methods and Madness: The Ron DeSantis Story

As Ron doubles down on his book-banning spree, 
loads of woke tomes sink beneath his decree. 

Of phonebook bans Ron's now the Sunshine State's pretor: 
"Discomforting names...? 'Harry,' 'Willie,' 'Rod,' ‘Peter’...” 

Prohibiting cookbooks is part of Ron’s schtick: 
“I'll not watch our kids forced to view ‘Spotted Dick’... 

...nor 'Bubble 'n' Squeak'...nope, nor 'Toad in the Hole' --

woke recipes meant for some bibliopole."

Shall art books be spared, Guv'nor...? “No! 'Cuz they're lewd -- 

woke statues of Romans de-figleaf'd. (They're nude.)” 

But what of Picasso...? And what about Titian...?

"Tits 'n' Pick-Assos...? They lead to coition!"

"History books must treat Uncle Sam right:

so CRT's outlaw'd -- lest power wash'd white.

Econ texts tracing a shrinking rupee...?

"Far too suggestive..." (His base would agree.)

Music instruction books: need they be burn'd...?

"Woke G-strings...? Woke F-holes...? That lot must be spurn'd."

Most sports books remain "no problemo" for Ron, 
“...tho' sports betting books I shall keep my eye on...

...as I stand in the way of our kids and each book...

...to become your next POTUS -- by hook and by crook."

(And by , doubtless, more GOP gobbledegook.)

Word Ladder: MANGO > MONGO

Fruit >>>

Mute >>>

Granite...? >>>

Planet

A stone drupe

off Bangladesh

national tree >>>

She hides but

her manga speaks

eloquently >>>

Correction:

this statue is

actually bronze >>>

The planet where

Ming works his

merciless cons

By Any Other Name; or. A Rally is a Rally is a Rally...

Drumpf’s rally names have coalesced 
around the theme of “BlisterFest.” 
 
Drumpf’s MAGA minions really rock’d 
his rally bill’d as “PistuleNacht.” 
(But don't bring home that shameless brain you 
check'd at “Bleb Me Entertain You.”) 
 
Where to score some pure bologna...? 
“Bullshit Running in Pimplona.” 
(Same shit air'd last Saturday 
at “Life’s a Verucabaret.”) 
 
Cheer Drumpf’s lies...and watch a race...? 
“NASCARbuncle”! That’s the place. 
(Where to watch his next arraignment...? 
Trumpotron at “Festertainment.”) 
 
(Drumpf’s poll numbers...? Watch 'em droppin’ -- 
once Drumpf's snuff'd at “Wartz-a-Poppin'”.)