Another Voyage 'Round Archaedia: Journey III

A is for Alma, who’s altered her will.
B’s for Bob bragging, “I’m under the hill.”
C is for Constance who voted for Hoover.
D is for Den neither shaker nor mover.
E is for Emma. Her race? Almost run.
F is for Fenton who’s purchased a gun.
G is for Grace who has good days and bad.
H is for Hank: calls computers “a fad.”
I’s for Inez who has doctored her age.
J is for Johann: dementia, third stage.
K is for Kathryn a petulant scold.
L is for Lon whose great-granddaughter’s old.
M is for Max who’s developed a goiter.
N is for Nan: claims the gateman “annoy’d” her.
O is for Oz: keeps a floozie in town.
P is for Paula. Her toenails turned brown.
Q is for Quentin. Rose says that he died.
R is for Rose: claims the newspapers lied.
S is for Shirl: mixes hounds tooth with plaid.
T is for Tim who passed. (Bowser’s so sad.)
U is for Ulmer, who’s taken up snuff.
V is for Vaughn. “Vaughn! Get offa yer duf!”
W’s Walt, who tells sick shaggy dogs.
X is for Xeno: he posts tell-all blogs.
Y is for Yasser. His room has no view.
Z is for Zoe. We don’t know her; she’s new.