Spooner Root Beer Float, Walk and Chew & Hands Across

Jerk squirts: soda-fountain treat.
Tush hurts; "so does" pair of feet.
One line enshrines a root beer float.
The second whines, "Ow! Foot/rear bloat."
     Moral:
The (sweet) tooth hurts.
Walk and chew gum: doing both is required.
Gawk and woo, chum! (And in neither get mired!)
     Moral:
Either/or is such a bore.
"Hands across water"...? 
Fragment of Beatlesong (merest of smidgens).
"Wands than cross...? Hotter!":
Magic's more "in" than be Christian religions.
     Moral:
Born again...? Nope: Norns your yen.