(Verses and images to come:
a work in progress.)
HAMPDEN
DAMP HEN
DAPHNE M.
MEAN PhD
DAPH 'n’ ME
…AND HEMP
H, P, M AND E
Poet Poe pens nonsense verse. "...plus phun," puns Uly, "I disburse." Its gamut runs from spam to worse. The matter posted...? Poe's diverse -- most, postcards from his universe, replies to grudges he must nurse. My summary...? Let me be terse: a mitzva, mostly. (Not a curse.)
Tuesday, February 18, 2025
Friday, February 7, 2025
Damp Hen Days; Or, What Do Hampden People Really Do All Day
Say "Good day!" to the Damp Hens of Hampden,
as are Hampden habitués known.
What they do all day really I'll itemize freely,
in hopes you'll their foibles condone.
As a typical “Hon,” Mrs Beryl O’Phunn
wears her hair in a towering hive.
It’s a do she had done in the Fall of ‘01
and once more in the Spring of ‘05.
Mr Paddy O'Kaykes wakes at 3 a.m., bakes
beaucoup batches of cannabis brownies,
treats he vends to his friends. (Paddy's making amends
for past sins against Hampdentown townies.)
(More entries, including accompanying portraits,
to come; a work in progress.)
...And Another Thing...: Also-Rans From MotorKat's Oyster Naming Contest
The Rolls Roysters,
a half dozen on the half shell
featuring the Shadow, the
Phantom, the Seraph, the
Corniche, the Ghost and the
featuring the Shadow, the
Phantom, the Seraph, the
Corniche, the Ghost and the
Cloud
The Helen of Troyster,
the most beautiful bivalve in the world;
aka The Hellion of Troyster, the most
shrewtiful bivalve in the world
The Hoi Polloister,
a mollusc for the rest of us
aka the People's Choister
The Celebrity Suite,
featuring the James Joyceter,
the Siegfried & Royster, the Myrna
Loyster, the Superboyster etc.
Thursday, February 6, 2025
...And Another Thing...: The Mophabet, An Illustrated ABC
(images and texts to come; a work in progress)
moa Moab moan moat
mob
mocha
modus operandi
moe
Mofango
mogul
mohair
moisturizer
mojo hand
moko
molasses
momentum
Monday
moonshine Moog
mop
MOQ
moron
Mostel
Mothra
mousse
moving violation
Mowgli
moxie
Moyses
Mozart mozzarella
Monday, February 3, 2025
...And Another Thing...: On The Contrary
Lit's not only long;
it's almost always wrong.
it's almost always wrong.
April's not the cru'lest month.
(That's gotta be December.)
The quality of mercy's very strain'd,
if you'll remember.
"To be or not to be...?"
That's not the question, folks have found,
while I believe that ev'ry man's an island,
pound for pound.
"To be or not to be...?"
That's not the question, folks have found,
while I believe that ev'ry man's an island,
pound for pound.
Despite your smiles, I don't have miles to go
before I sleep.
And a thing of beauty's not a joy forever --
read 'n' weep!
Nor is hope a thing with feathers.
Let me summarize my theme:
No: the world's not too much with us.
No: the world's not too much with us.
Yes: life is an empty dream.
Saturday, February 1, 2025
...And Another Thing...: Seven Miniature Four-Panel (3 3/8" By 8" Reducing In Three Folds To 3 3/8" By 2") Faux Exquisite Corpses And Their Respective Sets Of Rhyming Lines With Texts Derived From Puns Based On Homonyms To The Vocable 'Ex/Quis/It(e)/Corpse'
Faux Exquisite Corpse #1:
Hex/Wiz/Seat/Corpse
Hex/Wiz/Seat/Corpse
Hex:
Bright Pennsy-Dutch décor.
Wiz:
Wiz:
Oz oligarch of yore.
Seat:
Seat:
So soft when butts be sore.
Corpse:
Corpse:
One damn cadaver.
Faux Exquisite Corpse #2:
Hecht's/Whiz/It/Corpse
Hecht's:
Defunct department store.
Whiz:
Whiz:
That ersatz cheese you pour.
It:
It:
Part Bow,* part Addams lore.**
Corpse:
Corpse:
Yes, ma'am: cadaver.
*Clara, the It Girl
**The Addams's cousin It.
*Clara, the It Girl
**The Addams's cousin It.
Faux Exquisite Corpse #3:
Egg/Squeeze/"Sit!"/ Corpse
Egg:
What comes before the chick.
Squeeze:
Squeeze:
Sly baseball bunter's trick.
"Sit!":
"Sit!":
Command to Spot or Vic.
Corpse:
Corpse:
Grand-slam: cadaver.
Faux Exquisite Corpse #4:
Aix/Quiz/Zit/Corpse
Aix:
The Great Chas* knew it best.
Quiz:
Quiz:
A small exam; a test.
Zit:
Zit:
No adolescent jest.
Corpse:
Corpse:
press'd ham: cadaver.
*I.e., Charlemagne with reference to his palace
*I.e., Charlemagne with reference to his palace
complex at Aachen.
Faux Exquisite Corpse #5:
Haig's/Swiss/Hit/Corpse
Haig's:
"This stuff belongs to Al."
Swiss:
Swiss:
Not unlike Emmental.
Hit:
Hit:
(But who would shoot a pal...?)
Corpse:
Corpse:
Lost lamb: cadaver.
Faux Exquisite Corpse #6:
Aches/Oui!/Sid/Corpse
Aches:
First fruits of one's malaise.
Oui!:
Oui!:
Like 'si!' but en Francaise.
Sid:
Sid:
From TV's Golden Days.*
Corpse:
Corpse:
V'et (Nam) cadaver.
*Caesar (the comic
*Caesar (the comic
not the emperor)
Faux Exquisite Corpse #7:
X/Wheeze/Zed/Corpse
X:
Abu Kamil's* unknown.
Wheeze:
Wheeze:
How labor'd breathing's shown.
Zed:
Zed:
Initializes 'zone.'
Corpse:
Corpse:
Go! Scram, cadaver!
*A medieval Arabic algebr'ist
*A medieval Arabic algebr'ist
Wednesday, January 29, 2025
...And Another Thing...: Greenland Screams
It's not easy bein' Greenland:
ev'ry nation wants a piece --
there's the USA, the UK, China, Russia...
ev'ry nation wants a piece --
there's the USA, the UK, China, Russia...
even Greece.
Yet it's freezey bein' Greenland,
under Greenland's snow 'n' ice.
When our temp's below thirteen or so,
it isn't all that nice.
It's not easy bein' Greenland,
so strategically hot,
Drumpft insists we host his missiles.
(Don't dare tell him Greenland's not:
Mr. D'll be seizein' Greenland
as a 52nd state.*
"I'll tote ev'ry vote in Nuuk**
when I run in '28.")
*Having earlier annexed Canada as a 51st.
**Pronounced in two syllables: Noo-wook.
Tuesday, January 28, 2025
Thursday, January 23, 2025
...And Another Thing...: Prosopogostichs For Vance
How unpleasant to know Mr. Vance,
Orange Jesus's recent VP!
Did you vote for VPOTUS, by chance...?
A despicable pick, seems to me.
Were it me put J. D. in this trance...?
Why so quick to Drumpft's shtick bend the knee...?
It's my thought that we ought, to Herr Vance,
bid adieu...or would you disagree...?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)