The Cabinet Of Dr. Calimari-Lago: AG Matt Gaetz

With sundry twisted Epstein 

mates 

o'e r ice-thin ethics rules Matt

skates,

Take pre-pubescent girls on 

"dates"...?

What's next upon your sexist

plates...?

Tweens...? Adolescents...? neo-

nates...? *

"The center cannot hold," holds 

Yeats,

which may prove our collective

fates:

AG of these United 

States

is now "Things fall apart" Matt 

Gaetz...

...a wanker MAGA cele-

brates

who hates the same stuff MAGA

hates.

 

  * No mention's made of 'mastur-

bates.'

Apologia Pro Nuga Sua

I'm neither Shelley nor the Bard. 

Compare me not to Frost or Homer.  

Liken these* to Emily's...? 

Who claims so frames a gross misnomer.

   I'm not Blake or Plath or Sappho,

Donne or Emerson or Keats.

A neo-Blake...? Don't make me laugh! (Oh...

note: nor ape I Maya's feats.)

   My lingua...? Never elevated,

nor by critics highly rated.

Once it's all been said and done,

my doggerels are just for fun.

   *This footnote will shortly contain a list 

of Uly's eleven books of nonsense verse.

Oh, Hell: I Must Be Going: An ABC Of Departure

Anticipate the starting gun...? 

You bet your boots! Such shall be done.

I'll Break (or tie) the record for

the fastest mile (3:44*).

I'll Cut 'n' run. (Do not give Chase; 

just trust I must depart this place.) 

I'll Dash one hundred yards -- nay: more. 

Don't track me Down: I'm out the Door.

 

I'll Exit East (northeast at least). 

I'll deadhead -- tho' not (yet) deceased. 

You'll Eat my dust. (Apologies: 

here's hoping you'll not sneeze or wheeze.)

 

I'll Fly the coop. I'll Flee the scene. 

Nor will I tell Folk where I've been. 

I'll Get me Gone. I'll Go alone. 

I'll disconnect my mobile phone.

(And, passing 'Go,' I'll Grab some dough:

two hundred smackeroos -- Hi, Ho!) 

I'll Hit the bricks. I'll Hie me Hence. 

(None's done the like -- before or since.)

I'll Imitate ol' Aesop's hare

and Jog (tho' slow) on board shank's mare.

I'll Kiss my Kith and Kin "So Long!"

I'll Leg it. (Please don't get me wrong:

I'm Making haste while shines the sun.

Once comes the rain, 'twill all be done...

     * Actually the record for the fastest 

mile is 3:43.13 set on July 7, 1999 by 

Hicham El Guarrouj of Morocco.

     (a work in progress)

The Cabinet Of Dr. Calimari-Lago: Chief Of Staff Susie Wiles

Her coif -- cinereal -- she 

styles

in pearly pompadours 'n' 

piles.

Behind smug condescending 

smiles

she camouflages fascist 

wiles.

Assuming grins of croco-

diles

while highing five to POTUS 

"Heil!"s,

she foments Orange Jesus'

guiles.

Where are those Oval Office  

files...?

Ask Chief of Staff Ms. Susie

Wiles -- 

tho' prep for absolute de-

ni'ls.

(With staffers signing names like

'Wiles,'

we fast approach the Silly 

Isles.) 

The Cabinet Of Dr. Calimari-Lago: Stephen Miller

   Of 

racially-mixed communities no 

pillar. 

   Of   

migrant toddler's holding pens...? Ful- 

filler.

   Of  

Latin blood and treasure...? Super- 

spiller. 

   Hums 

not the "An die Freude" ode by 

Schiller.

   Of the 

soil of racial hatred Miller's 

tiller.

   Of the 

Constitution he's a hired 

killer:

   he's one 

nasty white supremacy dis-

tiller...

   (and now  

Chief of Staff for Policy) Herr 

Miller!

   (Forgive me if my diatribe grow

shriller:

   no

Drumpf corrupt appointment makes me

iller.)

Be We That We...?

Be we that we of whom it's said, 

"This isn't who we are"...?

Be we that we enraged 

that women's rights have gone too far...?

Be we that we who neighbors hear 

call climate change a hoax...?

Be we that we who're silent re: 

their neighbors' racist jokes...?

Be we that we who turn away

the planet's tired and poor...?

Be we that we who told the truth

but don't do any more...?

Be we that we of whom

"This isn't who we are" is said...?

We be that we. (Brief colloquy:

and we'd be better dead.)

 

Here's another fine mess 

you've gotten me into.

A Visit From Saint Nick Revisited, Stanzas I and II: "The Eve" and "The Stockings"

   I 

  'Twas the 
eve before 

Xmas Eve.
'Round my a-

bode, feelings --

spite, greed, im-

patience -- ran

high...and it

show'd.

 

   II 

   Stockings -- 

dozens -- were 

flung 'round the 

hearth without 

care. (I'd hoped  

Santa would 

leave me wa-a-ay 

more than my 

share.)

Grilled "Che"s: Another Twelve Iconic Cuban Revolutionaries

     Ur-"Che"

     Iconic Cuban Revolutionary 

Ernesto "Che" Guevara 

     Twelve "Che"quivalents 

    Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Hank Williams Tearjerker 

Your "Che"tin' Heart

    Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Way West

The"Che"solm Trail 

    Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Toddlin' Town 

"Che"cago

 

    Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Chewing Gum

"Che"cklits 

 

   Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Non-Renewable Energy Sources 

Shell Oil, Shale Oil and "Che"le Oil (All "Che"vron Products)

   Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Opening Third Of Railroad Line

The At"Che"son, Topeka and the Santa Fe

  

   Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Velvet Fog Holiday Song Opening Lyric 

"Che"stnuts Roasting On An Open Fire... 

 

   Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Foil-Wrapped Chocolates 

Hers"Che"s Kisses 

   Iconic Vuban Revolutionary Beethoven Buddy 

Carl "C(z)he"rny 

   Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Zola Denunciation 

'"Che"ccuse...!' 

   Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Monopoly Game Cards To Acquire

"Che"nce and Community "Che"st

   Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Monopoly Game Card To Avoid

Go To "Che'ail; Go Directly To "Che"ail (Do Not Pass Go, 

Do Not Collect 200 Pesos)

MAGA Wish Upon A Star; Or, Once Orange Jesus...

Once Orange Jesus gets his way, we lot become elite. 

Once we're elite, we march to no egalitarian beat.

Once we're elite, we sucker punch each stable soul we meet...

...nor leave our 6th of January love-in incomplete.

Once Orange J is holdin' sway, we lot become elite.

Once we're elite, we exile ev'ry immigrant to Crete.

Once we're elite, we cherish chaff; we 86 our wheat...

...and national abortion bans we -- finally --  complete. 

Once Orange J has had his say, we lot become elite. 

Once we're elite, we back the Klan...nor do we need a sheet.

Once we're elite, mass shootings wane (each citizen packs heat)...

...and children see they're free to be a lyin,' thievin' cheat.

Once Orange J has seized the day, we lot become elite.

Males (christian, white and far, far right) shall dwell on Easy Street.

We womanize 'n' chew our plug 'n' chug Wild Turkey neat.

We do all this 'n' more: we be the GOP elite!

"Che"mical Wedding: Another Twelve Iconic Cuban Revolutionaries

      Ur-"Che"

     Iconic Cuban Revolutionary 

Ernesto "Che" Guevara 

     Twelve "Che"quivalents

     Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Final Act Resolution Device 

Deus Ex Ma"Che"na 

     Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Dancing Shark Moll 

"Che"ta Rivera 

     Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Hollywood Simian 

"Che" Fred Muggs 

     Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Rumpolesque Pulp Immortal 

"Che" Who Must Be Obeyed 

     Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Female Tarzan  

"Che"na Queen of the Jungle 

    Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Nihilist 

Frederick Nietz"Che" 

    Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Literary Bedevil'd Soul 

"Che"bez Stone 

     Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Irish Poet 

"Che"mus Heaney 

     Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Hopheads 

"Che"ch & Chong 

     Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Old Bag 

Gu"Che" 

     Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Borscht Belt Regular 

"Che"cky Greene 

     Iconic Cuban Revolutionary Zappa Arabian

"Che"ik Yerbouti