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Monday, February 5, 2018

Beyond the Burgess Bovine (W)

You know the noted Burgess purple cow.
You know the cow of whom one asks, 'How now...?"
You've heard of cows who leapfrog o'er the moon.
But have you ever chow'd down in Cowloon...?

You've heard of fam'lies sheltering black sheep.
You've heard of sheep one counts to fall asleep.
You've read The Lost Sheep Parable full stop.
But have you sail'd the Good Sheep Lollipop...?

Of snakes that part the grass you've heard. You've read
of snakes which Eden's Eve and Adam fled. 
"The snake has all the lines," Jean Kerr's kid said.
But what of Mailer's "...Snakéd and the Dead"...?

That straws can break a camel's back you know.
That camels through a needle's eye can't go.
That camel's, once inside your tent, won't shoo.
But do you know what work a cam'll do...?

You know that fish and visitors will smell.
You know fish out of water feel like hell.
Of fish you've heard: "There's plenty in the sea."
But can you rightly spell 'e-fish-ent-ly'...?

You speak of rats deserting sinking ships.
The phrase 'drown'd rat' has often cross'd your lips.
"You dirty rat," barks Cagney, fist a-clench.
But do you know that 'ratatouille''s French...?

You've heard of pigs who build their house of twigs.
Of bricks as well, when pigs with plans build digs.
A greas'd pig, once, you chased about its sty.
But know you why act pigmies (sic) so shy...?

You've heard of dragon's teeth and dragon's blood.
In China dragons thrived before The Flood.
You know that Puff the Dragon fairy tale.
Still, there you sit, a-dragon on that nail.*

     * A 'coffin nail' (sometimes termed a 'coughin' nail') 
refers to a cigarette (sometimes termed a 'cancer stick') 
which, because it can cause cancer, is thought of as 
a nail for one's coffin. 

Three billy goats dubb'd Gruff -- you know the three.
To get folks' goats proves easy as can be.
And scapegoats -- for your sins! -- go to the mat.
Yet, zygoats (sic) aren't goats: do you know that...?

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