October the
twenty fifth, year of Our Lord
sev’ral
thousand and seventeen: Fats’s closed chord.
Still, though
Fats be defunct now, long-lived be his heirs,
all choice chanteurs whose chassis approximate pears…
and whose
surnames – i.e., the last halves of
their names –
bear
resemblance to some of my favorite games.
Note that many,
as Fats did, pianofortes play.
Hey! Let’s hear ‘em
before they get carried away:
AmpleAss Agon drips
cream on the keys.
Backgammon Beefcake’s
a black Deluise.
Check Chubby
Checker! He lists as he twists.
Dumpy Dice
comps with pluponderous wrists.
Enormity Euchre
rolls Porky Pig eyes.
And who’s
“Fatso” Faro? Just two of the
guys.
Gargantua Go
belts his blues from a barrel.
Hefty Hearts hollers
“More pie!” (At his peril.)
Inflated I Spy?
Too much glut ‘round that gut!
Jumbo Jacks:
wears he a fat suit or what?
Korpulent Keno?
No, he’s no Jack Spratt.
“Lard” Ludo performs
in E flat, for “he’s fat.”
Meaty Mahjong’s
more than pleasingly plump.
No-lean
Nintendo’s “no pork pie, all rump.”
Overstuffed
Ouija’s a doughboy-in-training.
Pudgy
Parcheesi’s obese…and still gaining.
Q. “Flabby”
Qwirkel performs at a fat camp.
Rolypole Risk
says, “I’d circumvent that
camp.”
SwollenCheeks
Scrabble’s one oversize swinger.
TrebleTon
Trivia? Arbuckle ringer.
Unskinny Uno’s
like (you know) a whale.
Voluminous
Vinci just busted his scale.
Wellpadded
Whist sings the blues about lipo.
XtraPounds
X-COM… (No, that’s not a typo.)
“Yer-too-fat”
Yahtzee’s one corpulent cove.
Zaftig Z.
Zingo’s a potbellied stove.
Piano men/singers?
Still oodles, all fat.
But their
R&B repertoire? That’s
where it’s at.
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