A is for Aidan: apprenticed to Amish.
B is for Bette: bought by brokers Islamish.
C is for Carl: caught, caged: coop’d in a cote.
D is for David: devour’d table d’hote.
E is for Edward: ensconced in an egg.
F is for Fran: force-fed figs. (Fran’s fate’s vague).
G is for Geoffrey: gone grey from gangrene.
H is for Hans: Help! Last heard from in Wein.
I is for Ike: hid on Innisfree Island.
J is for Jake: join’d a jazz band in Thailand.
K is for Kai: kill’d by klansmen in Kansas.
L is for Lon: lost – like luggage. (Lufthansa’s…?)
M is for Max: made to move east of Maine.
N is for Niles: no more! (Nooners his bane.)
O is for Oona: she’s out on her own.
P’s for Pauline: pull’d an Eva Peron.
Q is for Quinn: quarantined in a quarry.
R is for Reg: raped while rowing with Rory.
S is for Shel: sunk at sea on a charter.
T is for Ted: tends to trip, for a starter.
U is for Ulmer: undone by Ulysses.
V is for Van: voted “Viscount de Sissies.”
W…? Wendell: his way West he wended.
X is for Xeno: his xysts all upended.
Y is for Yuri: yelled “Yid!” at the Y.
Z is for Zeb: was our zoo’s zebu guy.
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