"There's this dick down the Dales..." About Andy: a Limerick (from AmalgaMates_

(Dalziel, a not uncommon Scottish surname, is pronounced, more or less, Dee-ELL. 'Dick' is slang for detective, and, while Andy is a detective superintendent, he's also a vulgar prick as well. 'The Dales' refers to the Yorkshire Dales, Andy's patch. The author of the Dalziel and Pascoe novels is Reginald Hill (in standard orthography). 'Tha' is thou or you in Scots dialect.)

There's this dick down the Dales dubbed Dalziel.

He puts partner Pete Pascoe through helziel.

In Hilziel's novels' accounts

his name's hard to pronounce,

and, I'll telziel tha as welziel, hard to spelziel.