Mr. Misogynist’s Book I (11)

Agatha saggeth. (Ugh!)

Audrey...? Too tawdry.
Bridget…? An 'idjit.'
With Bess, more is less.
     Cleo lacks brio.
Celeste lacks one breast.
Dolores will bore us.
Deniece…? She’s a mess. 
 
Edith might bleedeth
(twin Enid's spent spleen did).
Fleur...? Don't phone her!
Her sis Floss hits the sauce.
    Gertrude…? She's curt, rude.
Gwen's not yet ten.
Hortense abhors gents;
Helene…? Gathers moss.
 
Iris will tire us;
Imelda...? They've kill'd ‘er
Juana...? Manana!
Joan...? Leave her alone.
     Kate's overweight; 
sister Kath needs a bath.
Letitia's pernicious;
Lucille tends to moan.
 
Marlo…? No Harlowe
Mavis...? Lord save us! 
Nancy'd prove rancid;
Nadeen, too's, unclean.
     Olive's re-pahls-ive!
Odette we've not met.
Paige caught a phage.
Prunella's obscene!
 
Queen's just thirteen;
her half-sister's a Mister! 
Roxie lacks moxie. 
(Rochelle does as well.)
     Sonia won't phone ya;
Sinead must be paid.
Thalia's a failia; 
Terese looks like hell!
 
Uma's got tumahs.
Ursula…? Worse. (Ooh-la...!)
Vi's now a guy.
Veronica's m'ronic!
     Wallace will gall us.
Wren's gone off men.
Xanthippe's too hippy;
her cousin's bubonic!
 
Yma's a screamah;
Yvette is worse yet.
Zelda...? You've smell'd ‘er…? 
Zorah...? The horrah!
     [Each sister here listed 
is tacky or twisted:
The even ones...? Awful.
The odd ones…? Much poorah!]