Repost: Crisp Cashew Coating Chokes Cute Chocolate-Cover'd Crocodile

 

Repost: The Stroh's Of Yesteryear (Villon For The Vulgus: A Ballade On Dead Soldiers)

Francois Villon (1431-1463) composed a poem entitled 
"Ballade of the Dead Ladies" wherein occurs the refrain 
"Where are the snows of yester-year?" -- considered by 
some to be the most famous line of translated poetry in 
the English-speaking world. Dead soldiers mentioned in 
the title are empty beer bottles and cans.

Where now is young Stella, once christen'd Artois...?
And where dwells fair Glynnis -- nee Guinness -- the Dear...? 
And where bide the Buds of May...? Pour one pour moi.
O, where are the Stroh's of yester-year...? 

Repost: Incomplete Abecedarial Paean to Plaid (A Through L)

All ador'd my angora, 

nor'd none dare ignora a 

chemise made of Aertex I had.
Then I glimps'd Alan Ladd
on my iPad: Egad!
Was the shirt Al was girt with a plaid...?

Burlap broadcloth's unique,
and who'd not love batik,
nor'd a Battenberg lace be too bad.
But along bounded Brad:
weren't those jodhpurs he had...?
And those braces and belts...? All were plaid!

Cashmere, camel's hair, chintz,
cloth of gold (if mere hints):
cloth which starts with C...? Chiliads! Scads!
Note: the PM of Chad 
(K. P. Deubet's the lad)
rules in compets and boubous -- all plaids!

Damask, double-knits, duck,
with some denim (what luck!)
thusly dress'd, I'd resemble De Sade.
Then I thought of me Dad,
deadbeat dryad gone mad.
(Dad died dancing in dirndls of plaid.)

Each electronic textile,
in plain-, stripe- or check-style,
which to moi ensemble I'd add
called for stringent proscription
of cotton (Egyptian).
Egad! No more plaid...? 'Tis too sad.

For sale: five five-Farad
capacitors. Where had
I found them to wear...? In an ad.
Who'd foment such a fad...?
Flavor Flav, who's a cad...?
Nope! That fellow, by far, prefers plaid.

Give me gingham, then Gore-Tex.
A gauze pinafore nex'.
Then gabardine gowns of your dad's.
He'd the gonads to don 'em --
with quatrefoils on 'em.
Still, I'd be most glad to get plaids. 

Hand me hair shirts in herringbone,
hopsacks (to which I'm prone).
Harris Tweed widow's weeds...? Rad!
(Did I spy, on your helipad,
once ev'ry hebdomad,
CONELRAD op'rants in plaid...?)

I've loved fine Irish linen
and cotton that's Indi'n.
My feelings for these...? Ironclad!
Till a book -- 'twas an Iliad
bought in Islamabad --
introduced Islamic plaid.

Jeremiads (my own)
flow in triads: I moan,
"Jerseys, jutes, Jacquard suits...? Those I've had."
Now jihadists enlist
in Jamdani. I'm pissed:
they join up, jup'd 'n' jodhpur'd, in plaid.

Kanye's kid brother styled --
to look kooky and wild --
all my kaftans 'n' kurtas. Good lad!
But, like most city slickers,
he bypass'd my knickers,
my kilts and my kicks. None are plaid!

Linsey-woolsey...? A trace.
Leather briefs I embrace.
I've more linens than Vlad Lenin had,
who, in lush lingerie
done in lambs-wool lame,
long held sway. (Why's his loincloth not plaid...?)

Repost: What Are The Odds...? A Nominal Anomaly

Though an 'even''s seen in 'seven,' 

oddly, 7 isn't even.

That an 'even''s in 'eleven's odd: 

11, too, ain't even.

An "An 'even''s seen in 'seven,' 

although 7 isn't even"
seems, routinely, a fifteener. 

(Even so, 15's not even.)

An "An 'even''s in 'eleven,' 

though 11 isn't even,"
seems a byzantine fifteener. 

Still, 15 remains uneven.

(Note: these lines through which we plod
though, 'even's notwithstanding, odd,
we see wind down -- for which, thank Gawd! --
and roundly boo'd as oddly flaw'd.)

Trolley Song Ala Geisel's And To Think..." After Queneau's "Exercises"

In the midst of the rush hour, I noted this chap
who, as well as displaying a curious cap,
went lamenting and venting, fomenting a fuss.
And to think this began with my taking the bus.
 
Unseason'd he was – twenty-six if a day --
and as passengers pass’d, to his neighbor he’d say:
“Keep tha's knees to thaself! Leave me legs alone, Gus!”
And to think this began with my taking the bus.
 
He was wearing a hat, as I said, with a string
where its ribbon should be – a most singular thing.
And his neck…? Like a crane’s or giraffe’s it stretch’d – thus.
And to think this began with my taking the bus.
 
I ran into him later – I can’t recall where --
being told by his friend, “See…? Your coat needs repair.”
With my therapist Thursday my tale I'll discuss.
And to think it began with my taking the bus.

Runcibl'd Spooner: Paging Doctor Mom!

Which verse of Percy's sounds the best...?
Most swear -- sans fear of perjury: 
"Ozymandias"!
     At hospital, which jobs are Mom's...? 
Chairwoman...? Head of Surgery...? 
Ma's C and DS!
     Moral:

A soda jerk...? Not woman's work.

Runcibl'd Spooner: One From Column A

Eat this green leafy veg'table -- Brassica rapa
chinensis. It harbors nutrition galore. 
Bok Choy 
     Meet this stick figure playmate portray'd on the sidewalk
with white charcoal markers by me at age four:
Chalk Boy
     Moral:
Ya gotta have friends.

Where's Walrus...?

     The Walrus and the Senator go rushing 'round the Russell.

"Retard yall's step," the Senator prescribes. "Forestall yall's hustle!"

"When we win seats, no Dem defeats sub rosa alt-right muscle."

ThumbeLoser or The Further Adventures of Tiny Hans

"I won the election by a lot but I won

but if you count the legal votes I won 

but if you count all the illegal votes 

they can try to steal the election from 

us but I won by a lot but if you count 

the votes that came in late, we're look-

ing at those very strongly but I've al-

ready decisively won many really very 

many critical states but as everybody 

saw and you all saw I won by historic 

numbers...but a lot..."

                    

 

 

 

 

 

"I lo-...I lo-lo-los-...I lo-...I lo-lo-lo-..."

Haikuplets

     Haikuneiform

Ancient Near East.

Earliest writing system.

Logo-syllabic.

     Gilgamesh epic.

Surpassing all other kings.

Ozymandias. 

     Haikushner

Madame Tussaud look.

In-law; scofflaw; clapperclaw.

Keeps a kosher home.

     Mr. Ivanka

fails to pass a background check.

Whoopee, Kushioner!

     Haikugat

Gigolo music.

Waldorf after World War II.

Cugie draws cartoons.

     Fancies chihuahuas.

"Holiday in Mexico."

Abbe...? Meet Charo!

     Haikool

Menthol cigarette;

70-millimeters:
Brown and Williamson.

     Willie the Penguin;

Filter Kings & Super Longs:

Cancer of the lung.

      Haikualalumpur

Jungle...? Meet tin mine!

‘Lumpur’...? Local word for “mud.”
Twinn'd city...? Dubai.

     Say it in Malay:

Wilayah Persekutuan

Kuala Lumpur.

     Haikublaikahn

Genghis's grandchild;

Shi ying shao jing zhi lan feng:

Spring on Fragrant Hill.

     King o' the Mongols;

or, A Vision in a Dream:
person from Porlock.

     Haikukla

Fran(ces) Allison.

Cecil Bill and Beulah Witch.

Ollie and Fletcher.

     Madame Oglepuss.

Kuklapolitan Players.

'Puppet' per Putin.

 

Haikudrow 

Haikubrick

Haikuchen
Haikucinich
Haikudlow
Haikudos
Haikudu
Haikudzu
Haikugel
Haikuiperbelt
Haikukkiwon
Haikukulkan
Haikultur
Haikuklux
Haikumar
Haikumquat
Haikunegunda
Haikungfu
Haikupcinet
Haikuril
Haikurosawa
Haikurtvonnegut
Haikuwait
Haikuykendahl
Haikuzma

Runcibl'd Spooner: Fowl Bawl

He'll traipse through the timberlands.
channeling Stroud.
The Bird Watcher
     He'll channel the Rev'rend,
then misread...out loud.
The Word Botcher
     Moral:
Pick: little chicks or limericks!