Uly Poe's Fourth Voyage 'Round Archaedia: An Alphabet

A is for Axl, allergic to mold.
B is for Beryl: she will not be told.
C is for Chester, who suffers from shingles.
D is for Dodie: her left pinkie tingles.
E is for Efrem, whose lung shows a spot.
F is for Fran who frets, “Why’s it so hot…?”
G is for George: feels discomfort when sitting.
H is for Hope, who got punctured while knitting.
I is for Ina: ignor’d by her kids.
J is for Joan: calls all widows “The Wids.”
K is for Kate, always draped in a shawl.
L’s for Lorraine: has a thing for Rand Paul.
M is for Mel: endured cataract surgery.
N is for Nita: served six months for perjury.
O’s for Odette, who gets lost at the mall.
P is for Phillip, who “used to be tall.”
Q is for Quilla: she’s down with pneumonia.
R is for Roger who calls himself “Sonia.”
S is for Sam: hopes for one last hurrah.
T is for Trudy, who “misplaced” her bra.
U is for Ulric: he’s under the weather.
V is for Van, who is now into leather.
W’s Wilson, who won’t take his Plavix.
X is for Xilla, who frets, “They don’t have Vicks.”
Y is for Yan: hits you up for a fiver.
Z is for Zeph: in the end, a survivor.