Uly Poe's Sixth Voyage 'Round Archaedia: An Internally Rhyming Alphabet

A is for Andy: at 90, still randy.
B is for Billie: calls Andy “Sir Silly.”
C is for Clarke, who’s constructing an ark.
D is for Doris, caught bleeding her loris.
E is for Errol. Thank God the man’s sterile.
F is for Fran: starts each morning with bran.
G is for Gretchen, a femme fa-a-ar from fetchin.’
H is for Heidi: takes meals in her nightie.
I is for Ivan. (Is Ivan still drivin’…?)
J is for Jill, who’s rewriting her will.
K is for Keith. Keith’s been filing his teeth.
L’s for Laurindo: he flaunts his bay window.
M’s for Miranda: she breast feeds her panda.
N’s for Noreen of the proactive spleen.
O is for Otto: “Right now!”’s his new motto.
P’s for Pilar: keeps one eye in a jar.
Q is for Quinn. None know what state he’s in.
R is for Ross, First Floor Teaparty boss.
S is for Stephen, whose left leg’s uneven.
T is for Thor: shouts, “I’ll give ya ‘what for’!”
U’s for Ulysses: has no time for “sissies.”
V is for Vaughn. (Are those spats he has on…?)
W’s Wayne, who pretends to be Shane.
X is for Xavier. His issue’s behavior.
Y is for Yuri: a man in no hurry.
Z is for Zoltan: poor blighter’s been moultin.’