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Saturday, October 7, 2023

The Book of B, O + ABC: an Illustrated Verse Alphabet

     A 

B, O + A begets 
'boa.' 
     (This one's 
nosh...? Our new nanny, Ma-
ria José Figue-
roa.)














     B

B, O + B begins 
'bobby.' 
     (This one 
follows the footy in 
Falkirk while answ'ring to 
'Robbie.')















     C 

B, O + C begins 
'bocce.' 
     (Mostly 
mark'd in Milan -- tho' on 
Monday's in March in Ka-
rachi.)  














     D 

B, O + D begins 
'bodice.' 
     (This one's 
Heidi von Freund's. She in-
tends friends to fondle her...
...gratis.)
















     E 

B, O + E begins 
'Boeing.' 
     (Discon-
tent with their war profi-
teering proves goodly...and 
growing.)













     F 

B, O + F begins 
'boffin.' 
     (Truth to 
tell, I've been made out 
maven -- though lately less 
often.)














     G 

B, O + G begins 
'Bogie.' 
     (Spied nigh 
better half Betty Ba-
call and her ham-'n'-Swiss 
hoagie.)










     H 

B, O + H begins 
'boho.' 
     (This one's 
loathe to distinguish his 
goat cheese galette from his 
Ho Ho.)











     I 

B, O + I begins 
'Boise.' 
     (Seems when 
ev'ry tree falls in the 
forest, things really get 
noisy.*)
     *Cf: "If a tree falls in the forest
      and no one is there to hear it, 
      does it make a sound...?" as 
      this relates to ecologically 
      foolhardy forestry practices.













     J 

B, O + J begins 
'Bojan.' 
     (When he 
dunks on my Wizards, 
deem 'im extremely an-
noyin.')













     K 

B, O + K begins 
'Boko.' 
     (Which will 
lead to 'Haram,' which will 
lead to el multitud 
loco.)












     L 

B, O + L begins 
'Bolger.' 
     (Ray's play'd 
scarecrows 'n' dowager 
aunts; Cary Grant's play'd a 
soldier.*)












     M 

B, O + M begins 
'bombshell.' 
     (Not the 
blonde brand. Who's hurt must have 
more than some salve or some 
balm gel.) 











     N 

B, O + N begins 
'bonkers.' 
     (Sadly, 
citizens section'd so 
squat in asylums in 
Yonkers.)



 












     (Bonus: 
B, O + N begins 
'bonny'...  
     (...much like 
prächtig in German and 
gözel in Azerbai-
jani.) 



     


O 

B, O + O leads to 
'Boojum.' 
     (These Aus-
tralian species in-
sist dudes canoodle 'n' 
smoodge* 'em.)
     *Australian slang meaning 
       to curry favor, to faun.
















     P 

B, O + P begins 
'Bopper.' 
     (Though his 
belly bloom'd big, and he 
bopp'd, his career came a
cropper.) 
               
     Q 

B, O + Q begins 
'Boqs.' 
     (In Baum's 
book, Boq's beheld but a
bit; in Greg's* novel, Boq 
rocks!)
     *Gregory McGuire, author of Wicked.
















     R 

B, O + R begins 
'Boris.'
     (Counter-
spies Boris counters ac-
count for 'brat' Badenov's 
tsoris.)
     *Russian honorific 'brat' 
translates as brother.








  
     






     S 

B, O + S begins 
'Boston.'
      (Beacon 
Hill be the 'hood where Frost's
toss'd -- and, for three years, gets 
lost in.*)
     *The poet lived there awhile after 
       the death of his wife, Elinor.














    

      T 

B, O + T begins 
'Bottom.'*
     (Who, post
schtuppin' Titania,
charges 'er, "Smoke if ya 
got 'em.")
     *Comic relief both above and in 
       Shakespeare's A Midsummer 
       Night's Dream

















   U 

B, O + U begins 
'Boulder.'
     (When you're
five thousand feet above
sea level (br-r-r-r), sure it's   
colder.)















     
V 

B, O + V begins 
'bovid.'
     (When 'twas
anthrax afoot 'mongst the
herd, folk prefer'd to risk
COVID.) 





    







      W 

B, O + W...? 
'Bow Wow.'
     (Pictured
here...? One Shad Moss joining
Snoop Dog -- a Gangsta Rap
powwow.)




     



     
     X 

B, O + X begets 
'box lunch.' 
     (This one's
fi;;'d full of food fit for  
fräuleins -- 'tain't no frickin' 
jock's lunch.) 














     Y 

B, O + Y begets 
'Boycott.'
     (In a
film by that name,* the sole 
female lead weren't a part 
Loy** got.)
     *1947's Captain Boycott.
     **In '47, Myrna did land a part in 
        The Bachelor and the Bobby-Soxer.
        (Pictured below is largely unrelated 
        poisson of interest Myrna L'Oyster.)











    Z 

B, O + Z begets 
'Boz.' 
     (With his 
nom-de-plume 'Boz,' Dickens 
early earns pounding ap-
plause; 
     rhymed with 
French quelque chose, it could
bring this damn thing to a 
close.) 

 

Friday, October 6, 2023

Alpha Betes: The Boffolo

       "The Boffolo" 
  An Image for the Letter B excerpted from 
  "Alpha Betes: Unsung Elites Among the Beasts -- 
  an Illustrated ABC with Rhyming Distichs"

  The Boffolo roam.
  (We so hoped they'd stay home.)


Tuesday, October 3, 2023

Granny Anna's Anagrampage Rampage Page: an ELASTic et als tour de farce

    "In the 
parish of Sleat, on the island of Skye
     stands a 
column of slate eight...no: nine meters high. 
     In Pi-
raeus, in Greece, stands an andresite stela
     that  
shadows the shrine of the martyr St. Ela.
     Just 
south of Malay lies the Gaspar Selat
     where swarm 
lates -- tho' freshwater pisces they're not,"
     lip syncs
lady o' lit'rature Madame De Staël 
     in a 
breath stale with onions, tobacco and bile.,,
     ...then pro-
ceeds: "Oxford waterwheels, nourish'd by leats,
     grind the 
grain so at least all the neighborhood eats.
     Likewise, 
malts for the Altes beer brewers obtain:
    'May thou 
laste and endure, brewers!' That's the refrain."
    Asks her
priest: "Who's been bit by the vampire Lesta-..."
     "Cease!! D'you 
think an astel overhead spares you...? Nah!"
     warns De 
Staël. "You need garlic to borrow or steal.
     ' Salte that
bloodsucker!'...? Nope! Garlic's still the ideal."

     "From a
tsela' of Adam God fashions an Eve.
     An es-
tal houses Christ -- if His book you believe,"
     drones De 
Staël as, invested in bean greens and teals,
     in her
Model X Tesla down East L she wheels.
     These -- her
quotes -- via lyrics from E'Last arrive.
     That Ko-
rean boy band et als help 'em survive.
     (If you
covet more nonsense, more poppycock tales,
     consult
<PlAysWEllWithLetTerS.com> for details.)

*   *   *   *   *

     Materials and minimal definitions; rhymes are
     consistent with pronunciation guides consulted online. 

ST. ELA: canonized Turkish woman   
STEAL: pilfer  
STALE: not fresh   
SLATE: metaphoric rock   
SLEAT: parish on island of Skye    
STAËL: Anne Louise Germaine French Revolution woman of letters     
STELA: upright stone column   
SALTE: imperative 'to salt'   
SELAT: Indonesian strait   
TEALS: several blue hues     
TALES: stories   
TESLA: electric auto     
TSELA': Hebrew for 'rib'   
ET ALS: several expressions of 'and others' 
E'LAST: Korean boy band   
ESTAL: Old French for stall or stable  
EAST L: east portion of alphabetized street   
ALTES: style of lager from Detroit       
ASTEL: arch of boards above miners' heads in shaft    
LEAST: smallest amount     
LATES: genus of freshwater perch    
LASTE: obsolete 'last' or imperative "Endure!"   
LEATS: several trenches leading to British waterwheels   
LESTA-...: reference to certain vampire (interrupted)   

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