Señor Sid O’Zinn’s Seventh Voyage ‘Round Archaedian Acres Retirement Village (Another Gashlycrumb Sequel)

A’s for Alexis. Lord knows what her sex is!
B is for Bryan. His budg'rigar's dyin.’
C is for Claude. Claude’s complexion is flaw’d.
D is for Don. Jogs with not a stitch on.
E’s for Edwina. (Don serv'd her subpoena.)

F is for Fritz. Keep your distance: Fritz spits.
G is for Gil. He's (quote): "Under the hill."
H is for Hugh. I'd steer clear, were I you.  
I is for Iris. Her skin’s like papyrus.
J is for Junior. There pants no prat punier.
K is for Kyle. His “How wah ya...?"…? “Sieg Heil!”
L is for Lou. Lou moons, "Mine lacks a view.”
M’s for Manchu. Moans, "More tiramisu!"
N is for Norm. Calls pornography ‘porm.’
O is for Ollie. Don’t seek to meet “Dolly.”
P is for Pearl. Spoke in tongues as a girl.
Q is for Quinlin out gatherin' "kindlin.’"  
R is for Rex. Mixes plaids, stripes 'n' checks.
S is for Sol. Never “you." Always “y’all.”
T is for Truman. ‘Bout Drumpf Tru’s still fumin.’
U is for Urban. His breath...? Most disturbin.'
V is for Vlad. False Dmitry's his dad.

W’s Walt: “It’s them Dumbocrats’ fault.”
X is for Xena. Her nose has grown leana.
Y’s for Yvonne. Bakes one wild garlic naan.
Z is for Zack. Twelve years passing for black.