Dilemma: A Decad of Provocative Similarities

               Orange Julius                                Orange Jesus

1. Born in a fresh fruit juice stand,      1. Born in a hospital nursery,

Los Angeles, CA, 1926.                       Queens, NY, 1946.          

2. Partly named for roamin' Jewish      2. Partly named for treasonous 

cigar-store owner from Butte, MT.        Jew done in by Roman brutes. 

3. In later years, often pair'd with       3. For years, always seen   

chocolate pastries from Dunkin.'          dunkin' Big Macs in diet Cokes.

                                           

4. Uses base of vanilla mixed with       4. Abuses male bachelor base

batches of egg whites.                        advocating white supremacy.

5. Contains no alcohol.                       5. Disdains alcoholic brother.

6. From original stand, distributes       6. Favors bleach injection for 

medicinal tonics and Bible tracts.         COVID; doesn't own a Bible.

7. In 1967, sold off to International     7. For 67 years uses layers of

House of Pancakes.                            carrot-hued pancake makeup.

8. Claims in adverts, "I'm not              8. Tells perverts, "I am your  

just your vitamin C solution."              justice; I am your retribution."

9. On top is piled a frothy shock          9. On his toupe he heaps a 

of golden spindrift.                             pile of shocking gold spindrift.

10. His century of persistence ends     10. His uncensored existence  

up a great example of adhocracy.        ushers in end of democracy.