Frivolousity! Or, POTUS the Perpetual Plaintive: An ABC of Defendants in Some Pending Drumpf-Filed Lawsuits

Drumpf sues. 

Drumpf's suing an ape 

who, array'd in a cape, 
tied Drumpf's hands 
to Drumpf's glans 
with electrical tape. 

   Drumpf's suing a bear 

who set fire to Drumpf's hair. 

(When did POTUS 

first notice...? 

"Don, Jr. would stare.")

Drumpf's suing a cow 

who concocted, somehow,

to add lint 

(just a hint) 

into Donald's Kung Pao. 

   Suing, too, a dugong

(though Drumpf knows this is wrong) 

who discuss'd 

with disgust 

how Drumpf's ties are too long. 

Drumpf sues. 

Drumpf's suing an eel 

who Drumpf deem'd 'no big deal' 

when it noted 

(then gloated): 

"Drumpf's hand's never healed." 

    Drumpf's suing a fox 

for the way that beast mocks 

Donald's weight 

and his gait --

how Drumpf back-'n'-forth rocks.

Drumpf's suing a gnu

and its fourth-estate crew 

for reporting  

Drumpf's snorting 

when napping. (It's true.)

     Drumpf's suing a hen 

for purloining a pen 

Donald used. 

(Don's accused 

it of pilfering ten.) 

Drumpf sues. 

Sues, as well, an iguana.

Says Don: "'Cuz I wanna  

deport 

that sad sort 

on a boat to Botswana."

   Drumpf's suing a joey 

for billions, although he 

claims roos 

post 'fake news' --

"...plus they're swishy 'n' showy."

Drumpf's suing these koi

who, once girl-child and boy, 

now prefer

'him' 'n' 'her.' 

(They so-o-o-o-o Donald annoy.)

   Drumpf's suing a lynx 

who insists Drumpf's shit stinks. 

"I've best words

and best turds" -- 

or so Dumpty Drumpf thinks. 

Drumpf sues. 

Drumpf's suing a moose. 

Donald's case, most abstruse, 

claims the beast, 

while deceased, 

voted...twice! "Fraud!! Abuse!!!"

   Drumpf's suing a newt -- 

a most frivolous suit. 

Cash or cheque...? 

What the heck...

just as long as there's loot.

Drumpf's suing these owls. 

When Drumpf spots 'em, he howls: 

"Scumbag birds!"

(Donald's words.) 

"Un-American fowls!"

   Drumpf's suing a parrot.

Drumpf's suit's without merit. 

Drumpf heard 

that the bird 

hates Drumpf's hair: just can't bear it. 

Drumpf sues. 

Drumpf's suing a quail, 

wants to lock her in jail. 

Donald's ICE 

nick'd her...twice, 

but we help'd her make bail.

   Drumpf's suing a rat 

for its tweet "Drumpf's Too Fat!" 

Likes...? It got 

quite a lot -- 

more than Drumpf's tweets begat.

Drumpf's suing a snake, 

though there's little at stake: 

The snake stared; 

Don got scared... 

(The whole case is opaque.)

     Drumpf's suing a tern 

and its second wife, Fern. 

Judge got piss'd: 

case dismissed!

Live 'n' learn. Live 'n' learn. 

Drumpf sues. 

Drumpf's suing an urchin 

arrested while perchin' 

atop 

Drumpf's pro shop. 

For lost balls it was searchin.'

   Drumpf's suing a vole; 

claims the animal stole 

votes by mail. 

Verdict...? Jail 

In some foreign black hole.

Drumpf's suing these whales.

But my 1-to-10 scales 

say the odds 

are their pods 

will make sure the suit fails.

    Drumpf's suing a xyst, 

though his lawyers insist 

that Drumpf's suit's

all but moot, 

as Drumpf's xysts don't exist. 

Drumpf sues. 

Drumpf is suing these yaks 

for their rampant attacks 

on the lunches 

Drumpf munches -- 

Drumpf's fries 'n' Big Macs.

   Drumpf will sue the whole zoo --

which includes me 'n' you 

who dislike 

Drumpf's whole Reich. 

(And, Drumpf notes, we vote blue... 

...so he'll sue.)