Arrays: All Weathers

Arrays: All Weathers 

ABC of illustrated climate terms

(related verses also available)

Images of details to come

#2 pencil on copy paper 
glued to foam core

Arrays: Boo! An Illustrated Alphabet of Alarms .

 

Arrays: Boo! An Illustrated Alphabet of Alarms

Images

with rhyming  couplets

(related verses also 

available)

Images of details to come 

Fine-point Pentel on photocopy paper glued to 

foam core

Shown with hands for size reference

Arrays: "When 'Shit' Hits 'Fan'"

Arrays: "When 'Shit' Hits 'Fan'" 

Nine illustrated anagrams 

Chemical marker on photocopy paper 

8½" x 8½" 

Arrays: Adjectival Degrees

Arrays: Adjectival Degrees 

Illustrated wordplay 

Chemical marker on photocopy paper 

8½" x 11"

Arrays: Eggsposures

 

Arrays: Eggsposures

Illustrated egg puns arrayed in a dozen columns and a baker's dozen rows  

Shown adjacent to artist for size reference

Images of detailed views to come 

Chemical markers and colored pencils on photocopy paper taped to foam core

39½" x 59½"

A work in progress

Spoons, Double Spoons & Extended Spoons

telling brownies, "You're a bore!" : fairy slights :: 

e-waste issues...? Tell me more : SERI* flights :: 

wins by KO...? 44! : Larry's* fights

     * Sustainable Electronics Recycling International

     * Pro boxer Larry Holmes

 

gives your av'rage Saxon hopes : Robin's merry band ::

swarmin' -- grabbin' gyroscopes : mobbin' Sperry Rand 

to get myself a proper smoke, I'd sojourn where it's hot : 

I'd walk a mile for a Camel ::

I'd use whatever time it takes to seal that crack for Spot : 

I'd caulk awhile for a mammal

Jesus tells disciples so : "This is my body" ::

wed Bythoddy years ago : Mrs. Bythoddy 

Ask Not, Dr. Spooner, Whence Fresh Holoalphabetic Sentences Come

     The Exegesis 

Several slices of smoked salmon display flushed 

grimaces as they are removed from the buffet table 

after their unsuccessful attempt at a 5-K run. 

     The Spoonerized Pangram 

The brick-frown lox dump'd over a "quazy" jog.

My Dinner With Vlady (Xmas 2022)

 

Vladimir's Twelve Days of Isthmus or 24 Queries Concerning a Crescendoing Putin Cupidity

     Recitation of this text is, of course, quite alright, 

but the full effect might best be achieved through song.

I believe you are familiar with the tune.

On the first day, which isthmus 

does Vlad annex with glee...?

In Aisén, the Isthmus Ofqui...?

On the second day, which isthmuses 

prompt Vlad's "Absorb 'em...? Let's!"...?

Isthmus Olonets...

and, in Aisén, the Isthmus Ofqui...?

On the third day, which isthmuses 

shall Poot now set upon...?

Heptastadion...

Isthmus Olonets...

and, in Aisén, the Isthmus Ofqui...?

On the fourth day, which isthmuses 

will Poohtin now harpoon...?

Isthmus o' La Dune...

Heptastadion...

Isthmus Olonets...

and, in Aisén, the Isthmus Ofqui...?

On the fifth day, which isthmuses 

will prove Grasputin's pawn...?

Isth-...

     mus 

          Aaav-...

     aaah-...

lonnnnnn...

Isthmus o' La Dune...

Heptastadion...

Isthmus Olonets...

and, in Aisén, the Isthmus Ofqui...?

On the sixth, of which isthmuses 

will Poohtie ne'er let go...?

Portas do Cerco...

Isth-...

     mus 

          Aaav-...

     aaah-...

lonnnnnnn...

Isthmus o' La Dune...

Heptastadion...

Isthmus Olonets...

and, in Aisén, the Isthmus Ofqui...?

On the seventh, on which isthmuses 

will Vlad a bead now draw...?

Isthmus of Kra...

Portas do Cerco...

Isth-...

     mus 

          Aaav-...

     aaah-...

lonnnnnnn...

Isthmus o' La Dune...

Heptastadion...

Isthmus Olonets...

and, in Aisén, the Isthmus Ofqui...?

On the eighth day, which isthmuses 

lie well within Vlad's reach...?

Sere Chesil Beach...

Isthmus of Kra...

Portas do Cerco...

Isth-...

     mus 

          Aaav-...

     aaah-...

lonnnnnnn...

Isthmus o' La Dune...

Heptastadion...

Isthmus Olonets...

and, in Aisén, the Isthmus Ofqui...?

On the ninth day, on which isthmuses 

will grasping hands Vlad put...?

Istmo de Chubut...

Sere Chesil Beach...

Isthmus of Kra...

Portas do Cerco...

Isth-...

     mus 

          Aaav-...

     aaah-...

lonnnnnnn...

Isthmus o' La Dune...

Heptastadion...

Isthmus Olonets...

and, in Aisén, the Isthmus Ofqui...?

On the tenth day, which isthmuses 

a grab for will Vlad make...?

Nahuel Huapi Lake...

Istmo de Chubut...

Sere Chesil Beach...

Isthmus of Kra...

Portas do Cerco...

Isth-...

     mus 

          Aaav-...

     aaah-...

lonnnnnnn...

Isthmus o' La Dune...

Heptastadion...

Isthmus Olonets...

and, in Aisén, the Isthmus Ofqui...?

On the eleventh day, which isthmuses 

won't wait until mañana...?

Mel island, Paraná...

Nahuel Huapi Lake...

Istmo de Chubut...

Sere Chesil Beach...

Isthmus of Kra...

Portas do Cerco...

Isth-...

     mus 

          Aaav-...

     aaah-...

lonnnnnnn...

Isthmus o' La Dune...

Heptastadion...

Isthmus Olonets...

and, in Aisén, the Isthmus Ofqui...?

On the twelfth day, which isthmuses 

will, "annex'd," cap Vlad's guile...?

Catalina Isle...

Mel island, Paraná...

Nahuel Huapi Lake...

Istmo de Chubut...

Sere Chesil Beach...

Isthmus of Kra...

Portas do Cerco...

Isth-...

     mus 

          Aaav-...

     aaah-...

lonnnnnnn...

Isthmus o' La Dune...

Heptastadion...

Isthmus Olonets...

and, in Aisén, the Isthmus Ofqui...?

     Footnotes or If It's Tuesday, This Must Be Panama

 

1. An isthmus connecting the Taitao Peninsula with Chile 

2. An isthmus between Lake Onega and Lake Ladoga in Russia.

3. A causeway linking Pharos Island to Alexandria in Egypt.

4. Aka Miquelon-Langlade.

5. A large peninsula in the southeast of Newfoundland.

6. Land separating Macau from mainland China.

7. An isthmus connecting the Malay Peninsula to mainland Asia.

8. A tombolo connecting the Isle of Portland to UK's Dorset coast.

9. Istmo Carlos Ameghino in Argentina's Chubut Province.

10. Quetrihue Isthmus in Argentina's Nahuel Huapi Lake.

11. The Isthmus at Nova Brasilia.

12. Even in the U S of A.

Spoonissimus, -ah, -um

     Below you'll find expressed fifteen textual equations. 

Within each, a pair of ratios -- through their meters, rhymes 

and Spoonerisms -- appear unexpectedly equivalent. The 

notation employ'd to express them -- "a : b :: c : d" -- 

should be read "a is to be as c is to d."

 

paste those placards down the street : post no bills :: 

"I'm off meds," she's heard to bleat : boast...? "No pills!"

her pinkies ring (they also stink) : bells on her toes :: 

she snitches on her suitors...Fink! : tells on her beaus

illumined by monastic scribes : the Book of Kells :: 

Isabella's chef...? Good vibes! : the cook of Belle's 

part of count towards starting bell : ..."two for the show..." :: 

pinkie slipper -- S, M, L : shoe for the toe 

solfeggio pitches, sung in line : do, re, mi ::

a classic urbs begins decline : Rome, A.D.

beacoup performances it ran : The Me Nobody Knows ::

'tweren't him, my friend; 'twere some ol' man : then, he...? No, buddy: Mose! 

he classic renovatio led : the Renaissance Man ::

as Father's sisters, nephews sped : the men, as aunts, ran

half a pair of magic shoes : ruby slipper ::

off'd Jack's sister (and his muse...?) : slew Bea Ripper 

brass knuckles, clubs 'n' knives : gat mates ::

prefers pre-teens to wives : Matt Gaetz

it won Patricia Neal a Tony : Another Part of the Forest ::

more stench -- as from some putrid pony : another fart -- of the poorest 

he's not some guy who deals in cheese : a butter 'n' egg man ::

you'll call me only Marg'ret, please : an utterin' "Meg" ban

 

keeps himself unto himself : a man of few words ::

haunts the Feline Language shelf : a fan of Mew words

pair adds meaning to 'retired' : suicide pact ::

Edward Bear's eleven's fired : Pooh...? His side's sack'd

Hebrew National on bun : a Coney Island frank ::

fictitious Scot -- eccentric one : a phoney 'ighland crank

Shaw's Salvation Army vet : Major Barbara ::
colloqu'al "tan (wife's cigarette)" : "beige ('er Mar'bora)"   

Rhymes Beyond the Nursery -- # 43: Vendors

The iceman rings but once.
The postman...? Always twice.
The ragman rarely rings at all,
though (overall) he's nice.
     The tanner's hands are tann'd.
The fuller's hands are fair.
The scissor-sharp'ner's hands are scabb'd,
with plasters ev'rywhere.

     The butcher's face looks fat.

The baker's face looks lean.

The candle-maker's face looks waxy,   

not unlike that bean.

     The reefer man seems squat.

The moonshine man seems tall.

The backdoor man -- ill-bred, unread --

seems headin' for a fall.