Gals & Their Gigs (aka Rhondas & Their Rackets, Connies & Their Callings or Debbys & Their Dodges)

OCCUPATION:
Journalist podcasting about craft beers, wines and spirits
NAME:
Scheherazade Ogg-d'Ettbitter

OCCUPATION: 
Rights advocate for regional LGBTQ communities
NAME:
Freda B. Ewen-Mee

OCCUPATION:
Climate Activist Treasurer in local Hitler Youth  

NAME:
Hannah Greene-Goebbels

     (more Gals to come: a work in progress)

The Idylls of Ubu: Cantos VIII, IX & X: RBI BIO, RUB 'YAT & URB OUI

(a work in progress)

The Idylls of Ubu, Cantos VI & VII: ROB YOU & BRA ORB

(a work in progress)

Runcibl'd Perispooner

Streaming's such a racket -- it's costin' me a packet. :
Pay-Per-View ::
(Me): Don't y'all smell gas...? (You): Don't be an ass! :
Vapor! Phew!

Wordplaythings IV: The Party Game

Grab your 

scissors, 

cut out your 

favorite 

MAGA-

mendacity 

conversation 

balloon text

and pin it 

nearest to 

whichever

cavity it 

sounds like 

it's issuing 

from.

Wordplaythings III: The Deep (State) Dive Into Donald's Toy Chest

     What's globular, plastic-coated, titian-topp'd  and balder than a cacklefruit...?

It's Drumph's MAGAgic Hate Ball, 

resembling nothing more nor less than one 

alarmingly porcine ball -- whether spit-,

sour-, soft-, odd-, low-, scuzz-, scum-, 

butter-, puff-, moth-, foos-, hair-, golf-,

sleaze-, base-, dirt-, screw-, slime-, goof-, 

curve-, black-, cannon-, knuckle- or 

racquet- racket- is entirely your call.

Just ask your Hate Ball a yes-or-no 

question, then shake it three times and 

turn it upside down to read the answer 

appearing in its bay window, an answer 

always expressed, of course, in only good

words -- indeed, "the very best words."

A small selection of 

MAGAgic Hate Ball Answers:

"GRAB

'EM BY THE

PUSSY."

"JEB LIKES

ILLEGALS BECAUSE 

OF HIS WIFE."

"THEY'RE 

MURDERERS, THEY'RE

RAPISTS."

"I HAVE

DOUBTS HE WAS BORN

IN THIS COUNTRY."

"MIDLER IS AN

EXTREMELY UNATTRACTIVE

WOMAN."

"I HAVE A GREAT

RELATIONSHIP WITH

THE BLACKS."

"BAN ALL 

MUSLIMS ENTERING

THE US..."

"HATE

IS WHAT WE

NEED."

 

"LAZINESS

IS A TRAIT OF 

BLACKS..."

"I

LOVE THE POORLY

EDUCATED."

Wordplaythings II: The Barbie Doll

 

THE KLAUS BARBIE
EINS

THE KLAUS BARBIE
ZWEI

Wordplaythings I: The Smurf

 

SMURFY'S LAW:
If stuff CAN get smurf'd up,
stuff WILL get smurf'd up...
and always in the
smurf'd-upest possible way.

WoLaLy: SOUP to NUTS

These verses concern (if their accents don't droop)

crumbling crackers 'n' rusks into alphabet soup.

Biscuits (Triscuits 'n' Carr's) are the hardtack I choose.

(Scores -- and more! -- y'all can score with a fistful of sous.)

Them Premium Unsalted Tops...? They'll do, too

(as will Late July Classic Saltines, entre nous).

Munch Crunchmasters! They come in hundred-pound lots,

ever term'd "de rigueur" by our planet's "have-nots."

Ergo, biscuits be basics -- no 'if's, 'and's or 'but's.

(Thus my meal, like my song, starts with 'soup,' ends up nuts.)

 

     * Crackers can be called biscuits in the UK.

M&M's X 2: Four Graphic Marks

 

     In the column to the left 

appear four graphic marks

incorporating the letter M.

     The first represents a

single stylized M atop an

image of a stack of pages.

     The marks were designed 

by illustrator Uly Poe during 

one of his former lives.

     The second represents 

the letters MB contained 

within a graphic rule.

     Poe can no longer recall 

the names of the clients who 

commissioned the marks,

the third of which appears

to portray the letters MC.

     That one is followed by a 

mark introducing the letters 

MW which appear to provide

the data in an economic bar

chart.

     None of the four contain 

milk chocolate, nor do any

feature a thin candy shell.

Clerihews for Uly's Friends & Relations: an Ongoing Series

Adrian Boyer

channels Tom Sawyer --

though instead of lighting out for the territories,

he's heading for Florence, Italy where he'll doubtless enjoy encounters which will make for some intriguing stories. 

Sebastian Boyer,

a reticent warrior,

is nonetheless able to punch out some miscreant's lights

if that scumbag should dare to endanger Seb's fam'ly (although Baz prefers to steer clear of such fights.