Born Royal...?: A NightM.A.R.E.* in Three Cantos

     So-called "NightM.A.R.E.s" are nonsense 

verses excessively stressing Meter, Alliteration, 

Rhyme and Esotericosity.

     "Born Royal...?" concentrates on kings and 

queens, caliphs and rexes, duchesses and 

supreme leaders, chancellors and dukes...and 

a solo Semitic margrave.

     One 

Late I've wonder'd: had I been born royal,

would've life aloft lessen'd the roiling, the toil

which, at boil, spur'd attempts to shed life's mortal coil...?

Would I've access'd such spoil, were I royal...?

     Born Charlemagne, King of the Franks,

would I’ve issued Haroun al-Rashid Sherman tanks

as small payback for Abul-Abbas, with my thanks...

if born Charlemagne, King of the Franks...?     (per GFH)

     Born Joshua, Rex Judeorum, 

would I've brew'd such to-do's in Jerusalem's forum

while failing when jail'd to arrive at a quorum...

born Joshua, Rex Judeorum...? 

     Born Caliph Haroun al-Rashid, 

would I've bury'd my harem and married some Swede

flank'd by ring bearers, each a faux Joël Embiid...

if born Caliph Harun al-Rashid...?

     Two 

Born Wallace the Duchess of Windsor,

would I've leapt from my bed on the day which begins her

affair with der Führer -- Come the schnapps! Come, some Linzer...

born Wallace the Duchess of Windsor...?

     Born Oberon, King of the Fairies,

would I've ceded Seal's Rock and attack'd the Canaries,

grenades (three pair) launch'd with a prayer (three Hail Marys)...

born Oberon, King of the Fairies...?

     Born Jong-un Supreme Leader Kim,

would I've sooner shirr'd eggs than shared egos with "him" --

and by "him" I, of course, ref'rence Donald the Dim...

if born Jong-un Supreme Leader Kim...?

     Born that merciless emperor Ming,

would I've pencil'd a pact with the Clay People's king

to entrap earthman Flash in a Mongo-wide sting...

born that merciless emperor Ming...?

     Three 

Born Edward K. Ellington, "Duke,"

would I've traded my top hat for powder'ed peruke

while ignoring the box bobby-soxers call 'juke'...

if born Edward K. Ellington, "Duke"...?

     Born Chancellor Angela Merkle,

would I've laid bare my lights in a whole 'nother circle

while tattling tales to that talk-show host Terkle...

born Chancellor Angela Merkle...?

     Born Queen Isabella of Spain,

would I've diss'd Chris Columbus ("That punk proved a pain!"),

keeping USA properties public domain...

if born Queen Isabella of Spain...?

     Born Moses the Margrave of Mohels,

would I've thrived, so alive in such splendorous soils...?

Would I've bedded, than wedded, more better-class goils...

were I born 'mongst the mondo of royals...?

Xanadon't

In Xanadu did Kubla Khan a stately pleasure-dome decree.
But Kubla's crib had nothing on the "tajma hall" decreed by me.

My designated Grand Vizier who, formerly a choc'latier

compell'd to leave Leuze-en-Hainaut beneath a cloud ("They made me go"),

in place of Alph the sacred stream, provision'd ponds with clotted cream,

then stock'd each pool with shortbread fish, which pairings proved one "dish delish."

     (a work in progress)

Spoony + Goony

Kern + Gershwin = hit: 

     a lucrative equation. 
Chinese spy and Yuri's bit 

     o' fluff of queer persuasion.
          Long Ago (and Far Away) / 

          Wong (a foe) and Lara (gay)

'Twas brillig.

'Twas thought to be brillig.

'Twas about to have been brillig.

'Twas...what's that...? You say it wasn't brillig...?

The King in Orange or This Rectum Runs the Spectrum

He, brought up in the green,
with spoons of silver in his mouth,
would Yellow Fever ne'er encounter.
Black Death...? Nope! Nor drouth.
     All businesses bequeath'd to him
he ran into the red,
which left his dad and mother blue
(who're Mary Anne 'n' Fred.)
      His soul...? It runs to shades of gray,
all bordering on black.
The candidates he backs...? Fa-a-ar red.
(Of those there's ne'er a lack.)
     His offspring...? White supremacists.
His dermis he terms tan.
His thatch is prematurely blonde.
He's psycho-delic, man!

Gerald FitzSpoon

A stamen...? A pistil...? This circle is hesitant.
Group granting succor where Bubbe's a resident.
     Transgender community / Gran's tender community

Pentel Puns: Games Führers Play: Exquisite Corpse

Recollecting a Loser

Not Kublai Khan in Xanadu;
Not Lincoln in the Bardo.
Not Conway, Hugh at Shangri-la
was Drumpf at MAGA-lardo.
In days to come, recalling Drumpf,
that awful autocrat,
think Bonaparte at Waterloo.
Think Casey at the Bat. 

V of D Q & A

     Q: 

What's the funniest line Emma Chambers's Alice Tinker ever delivered...?

     A: 

I can't believe it's not "I can't believe it's not 'I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.'"

Palace Leaks or Time to Draw on the Special Relationship

Said Charles to his Camilla,
referring to his pen,
"Oh god I hate this bloody thing.
Look! Here it goes again."
Camilla's answer to her Charles...?
"It's going everywhere.
What you require's a Sharpie, Sire.
I bet Trump kept a spare."

Pentel Puns: Games Führers Play: Sign My Yearbook: Hitler Youth, Class of '39

 

Li'l Liberry-a-Lago